The Shadow over Nishinomiya
by Hcobb
Summary: The Haruhi Suzumiya characters under Lovecraft ground rules.
1. Chapter 1

[My apologies to the obvious original authors, whose works should never be combined. -HJC]

"The Supernatural Phenomenon Research Club?" I read aloud the crude handwritten sign over the door, uncertain if I had deciphered it correctly.

"Well, not anymore!" Haruhi Suzumiya threw open the door. "See, there's nobody here!"

I tried to adjust my eyes to the gloom in the room. Other than the illumination from the hall, there was only a small glimmer from the far side, where the curtains did not quite meet. Under that far light hunched a figure that now looked up with enormous circular eyes. After a moment I realized that these must be glasses, worn by a diminutive figure, with the distances hard to judge in the darkness.

Haruhi stepped inside and felt along the wall. She flipped a switch, but the shadows remained unlit. "It's burned out?"

"Uh, excuse me," I said to the dweller in darkness, "do you know where the members of the Supernatural Phenomenon Research Club are?"

"They did not return." She whispered hoarsely, as if she had not been called on to use her voice for a very long while.

"They must have all graduated or something." Haruhi made her way carefully into the gloom, until she reached the curtains on the far side, which she threw open.

The shadowy figure flinched away from the light, and covered her face with a book. She wore the proper uniform for a freshman girl at our North High School, but she was so slight that she could have easily have passed for a junior high school student three years younger. Her short hair however was of a silver-gray hue to be expected from a woman many decades older.

I walked to within a few steps of the young/old girl and asked, "do you know when the club members will be back?"

"They did not return." She looked at me and blinked once. It was as if she expected that I had simply not heard what she considered to be a complete explanation the first time.

"So, you are the only remaining member of the club?" Haruhi asked her.

"Yes." The gray haired girl went back to reading her book.

"See, Kyon?" Haruhi turned to me. "The club will close if she doesn't get more members, so we're doing her a favor."

I took a moment to look around the room. Besides the huge fabric covered reading chair that the girl hunched in, with her legs folded under her, there were four folding chairs around a table and bookshelves along one wall. These were filled with what seemed to be very old books. There were titles in East Asian, European, Russian, Arabic and Hebrew scripts. Some of the books had patterns on their spines that may have either been strange icons or perhaps scripts for languages I had never seen before.

Everything was covered in dust. The school janitorial staff must not have visited this room for months, perhaps years. I looked down at the floor. I saw my and Haruhi's footprints from the door to our current positions, but no footprints leading to the girl's chair. How long had she been sitting there?

"So what is your name?" Haruhi asked the girl.

"Yuki Nagato," The girl responded from behind her book.

"Well, I'm Haruhi Suzumiya and this is Kyon. We'll be using this room from now on. We'd like to welcome you to our club."

Wasn't that the other way around? I thought, shouldn't we be the ones asking to join her club?

Haruhi waited in vain for Miss Nagato to respond to her invitation, then looked around the room. "Well it's a bit of a fixer-upper, but it is the only available clubroom so let's get to work." She stopped and looked up, "Strange."

I followed Haruhi's gaze up to the ceiling, past the cobwebs. The light fixture was lacking not only a cover, but also the light tubes themselves.

"Well, no wonder the lights don't work." Haruhi grabbed my necktie. "Come along Kyon. We'll find everything you need in the janitorial supplies."

Thirty minutes later, after standing on the table to replace the lights, I was using the mop and bucket Haruhi had borrowed to clean the floor. I had considered telling her to have me start by dusting so that I wouldn't have to redo the mopping after the dust had settled, but I didn't want to suggest to her additional tasks to assign back to myself.

"So Miss Nagato, what's that book like?" I asked the girl who had continued to read through all this.

She held the book up towards the sting of the uncovered florescents. The title seemed to be in Arabic or something.

I found her shoes under her chair, in the dust and covered in dust. I used the handle of the mop to scoot these out of the way so I could mop under her chair. I carefully avoided looking up her skirt as I did so, but she seemed to take no notice of my actions.

When I returned home, my grade school sister looked me over then remarked, "What's with all the dust Kyon? Have you been exploring forgotten tombs again? Just kidding. I know you never do anything interesting." She ran off to her room laughing.

Just once, I'd like her to call me "big brother" again.

The next day, as my class was washing up after P.E., a fellow classmate named Taniguchi asked me if I was still 'with' Haruhi.

"I suppose."

"That's a new record then."

"What?" I looked up at him.

"Every boy at our junior high dumped her."

That was a bit harsh of joke, even for Taniguchi, so I decided to press the point. "Are you saying that she's a slut?"

"As far as I know she's never even been kissed. It'd be okay if she'd just close her eyes, but the look in them. It's no wonder half the boys ran away screaming. Then the next one would decide that the rest of us were wimps and ask her out, only to flee himself." Taniguchi shuddered with a classic look of mock horror.

"Yeah, yeah." I wiped my hands dry.

He'd been a joker for the few weeks I'd known him, but it seemed unlike him to insult a girl he had acknowledged to be good looking.

"When you get burned, don't go crying to Miss Asakura. She's the real wonder at our school and I'm going to make her mine."

"Oh, what's that about me?" Our class representative Ryoko Asakura was standing next to us in her PE outfit.

I must not have heard her approach, over the distant noise of the other students. Taniguchi seemed flustered, so I made an excuse for him. "My friend Taniguchi here was just commenting on your amazing running time, Miss Asakura. Perhaps he'll ask you out to tea sometime?"

"You are too kind, Mr. Taniguchi." She smiled and bowed, then turned to me. "But it's nice that you're getting along so well with Miss Suzumiya. She seemed so alienated from the class."

Well with an introduction speech that asked to meet with creatures from out of time, from other worlds, or with strange abilities, who wouldn't be?

"Excuse me please," I bowed and left them.

On my way back to the classrooms I considered the other strange story that Taniguchi had told me about Haruhi, that she had been found babbling deliriously one morning in the middle of a giant chalk drawing she had made in the quad at their junior high. I knew she was a little unusual, but it was unlike Taniguchi to slander somebody so. I suspected that he was the one boy she had dumped, and that this had left him with a bitter feeling towards her. I just wished that our brief friendship had warranted some honesty from him.

After classes I sat in the slightly more livable clubroom and did my homework while I waited for Haruhi to show up. Miss Nagato had flinched again when I had turned on the lights and then ignored my greeting when I noticed she was there. She was reading another book. This time the cover title was in German, or a related language. How many languages did she know? She must be one of those reclusive kid geniuses you read about from time to time. Perhaps she was junior school aged, of normal height for her age, and just a few grades advanced.

But one thing bothered me. Her shoes had not moved from the spot I had shoved them to the previous day. She still sat in the big chair with her legs folded under her. With the padding on the chair that looked to be a fairly comfortable position for one so small, but didn't she ever go home?

"What were you doing in here, before we came in yesterday?" I asked her.

"I was taking a nap."

For what, months, years? I didn't ask the questions whose answers I was unprepared to accept.

Haruhi arrived, dragging in a girl who was slighter than herself, even though she was wearing a sophomore uniform. "Our newest member, Mikuru Asahina!"

"Where did you kidnap her from?" I asked.

"I found her wandering around the school in a daze." Haruhi turned to her captive and asked, "what sort of after class activities do you have Mikuru?"

"I'm a miko in training."

"Well quit that and join our club!"

"I can't! It's our family shrine!"

"Very well, just bring your miko outfit tomorrow so you can save time by changing here."

"And why do you want her to do that?" I asked.

"It's these giant boobs!" Haruhi reached from behind to grab Mikuru's bosom. "Can you imagine what sort of evil spirits it must attract to have them spilling out of a miko outfit?"

"You are the only evil spirit here," I said as I pried Haruhi off Mikuru. "Now stop that. Sexually abusing a miko is bound to get you cursed."

I bent down to where Mikuru was sobbing on the ground and helped her to her feet. "Don't listen to Haruhi. You do not have to join, if you just don't have the time."

Mikuru sniffled as she looked around the room until her gaze settled wide eyed on Miss Nagato. "There's something I need to take care of here."

"See!" Haruhi patted Mikuru on the back. "She's fine with joining, fine."

Haruhi then announced that we would be called the SOS Brigade.

I recognized the international distress signal, and thought it quite fitting.

I had just taken my seat in the classroom the next morning when Haruhi said from behind me, "I found out why Yuki wasn't attending classes."

I turned towards her. "Yes?"

"The school had her records mixed up with another student of the same name who started here a decade ago, and then mysteriously vanished in her freshman year. Can you imagine that, they're still working on the same records they had then, and they haven't even changed the school uniforms in all this time."

"Well, isn't this the sort of mystery you formed the SOS brigade to solve?"

"What mystery? It's just a bureaucratic mix up. They didn't even have a residence on file for her, so she's going home to your house tonight."

"What?"

"Don't worry, I've already cleared it with your mom. You're excused from Brigade activities today so you can get her settled in."

Miss Nagato followed me home silently that afternoon. I had to turn back a few times to make sure that she was there, because I didn't even hear her footsteps. By the time we got to the station she seemed to be lagging, so I had her ride on the back of my bicycle, in the same fashion that Sasaki had, the previous year, until they locked her up.

Nagato's hands were cold on my shoulders.

I opened the door to my house and stood aside for Nagato.

My little sister ran out. "Are you Yuki?"

Miss Nagato nodded.

"We're going to be roommates from now on! You can call me Little Sister, big sister Yuki."

"Understood." Miss Nagato blinked very slowly, like a frog.

"Oh, you poor thing." My mother grabbed Miss Nagato and hugged her tightly. "To lose your entire family in a fire and be left with just the clothes on your back. Let's go shopping to get you a few things."

"Can I come along too?" My sister asked.

"You don't mind, Yuki?" My mother asked the creature she held.

"No."

I had seen Haruhi pull scams in person, but to make this sale over the phone? She had a brilliant career in telemarketing ahead of her.

At supper Miss Nagato ate very little and slowly, while my sister talked to her about the random things she found of interest.

I slept poorly that night, waking to jump at shadows. In the morning I fell out of bed as my alarm clock rang. I looked to my door. My sister did not burst into my room, as was her habit, so I made my way silently to her room and carefully opened the door.

There was a sleeping bag laid out next to my sister's bed, but it had clearly been unused. I looked over to her bed where my sister was uncurling herself from Miss Nagato's arms.

"Morning, Kyon."

"Why didn't you come wake me?" I asked.

"Oh, sorry. We were up late last night while big sister Yuki told me stories."

"Why didn't I hear anything?"

"She whispered them, you dummy! She didn't want to bother anybody else."

As Miss Nagato rose, I saw that she was only in her bra and panties and quickly made my exit.

After breakfast we three walked together for a while, with my sister holding Miss Nagato's hand, which she reluctantly let go when we got to her school.

"Have a good time at school today, big sister Yuki, and you too Kyon."

Miss Nagato rode behind me on my bicycle in silence for a while then I decided to strike up a conversation. "My sister seems to really like you."

"She is interesting."

"Sorry about peeping in like that this morning, I just wanted to see how you two were getting along."

She said nothing so I stretched for something to say. "I only caught a glimpse, but have you ever considered how you might look without your glasses?"

"Poorly. The refractive indices of water and air differ."

Was that meant to be some explanation for how the eye worked?

In the clubroom after classes, Haruhi announced that our operations required a computer and so led us three to the nearby computer club room. She threw open the door and pointed to one of them, "You are the Computer Club President, correct?"

"Yes." He stood. "What is the meaning of this?"

"The SOS Brigade requires a computer." She grabbed his necktie and stared into his eyes in a manner to which I myself was all too well accustomed. "Provide us your newest one."

"What are you people?" His eyes passed over Mikuru, Miss Nagato and myself, before getting trapped in Haruhi's gaze. "We can't just give away the computers we've worked so hard for."

"You will." Haruhi leaned in closer and followed as he took a step back.

"No. No." He backed into a corner and slid down.

Haruhi bent down at the waist to follow him, and jerked on his necktie to get him to look up at her. "Well?"

"Take what you like! Just leave me alone!"

Haruhi released him and he dropped his head to his knees, with his arms crossed over his head. The rest of his club remained in their seats. They looked at Haruhi, then flinched away as she scanned the room.

Haruhi pulled a list from her pocket and said, "let's see, which of these match to the newest PC models. Hmmm. Okay Kyon, detach this one and bring it to the clubroom."

"No, not the newest one!" The computer club president complained from his corner.

"Yes?" Haruhi looked over at him.

"Okay! Take it. It's our gift to you." He collapsed again and sobbed loudly until we left the room with our loot.

Later I pointed out that our clubroom did not have Internet access so Haruhi paid the computer club another visit and they were soon stringing wiring for our connection. They flinched from her gaze as they hurried to complete the task.

That evening as we were preparing for bed, I walked into the only bathroom in our house and stopped.

Miss Nagato was shampooing my sister's hair. Each of her fingers moved independently, twitching to unheard, unworldly music.

"Kyon, you pervert!" My sister screamed, "stop staring at me!"

"Oh, sorry." I left and closed the door.

That night I watched the shadows in my room as sleep eluded me. I think I finally nodded off for a bit then startled as I noticed my door was opening. There was a figure in the doorway that closed the door behind itself and then crept silently through the gloom. From the outline and size I assumed it must be Miss Nagato. The only sound was a slight creak from my chair as she turned it around to face me. Then sat down in it.

"You are awake." She stated it as a comment, not a question.

"Yes." I turned my head towards her. From the small amount of light entering through the window I could see that she wore only her bra, glasses and presumably panties. I admit that I had entertained the possibility of sneaking a mostly naked girl into my room at night, but I swear that my fantasies had only been about human girls. "What do you think you're doing in a boy's room in the middle of the night? What if my parents find out?"

"What is your concern? Is it that? Do not worry. Our kinds are biologically compatible, and you seem to be suitable, but there is no time for that at the moment."

"Oh." Suddenly she had spoken more than she ever had before. What was this, was she coming on to me?

"What is your assessment of Haruhi Suzumiya?"

Was she trying to judge my feelings for the other girl to weigh her chances? I considered saying something along the lines that unlike Haruhi I'd only consider dating humans, but I didn't want to insult her into making a fuss in my room. "she was the strangest student I had ever met." I left the "until I met you" part unspoken.

"Acceptable." She stood next to my bed and put a hand to her glasses. "We do have a few hours until your sister awakes. If you like."

"No! I need to get some sleep. It's a school day tomorrow."

"Very well, over the weekend then." She walked to my door and closed it silently behind her.

I lay there watching that door for what seemed like a long time before I dozed off.

In the morning when the alarm clock awoke me, I considered the conversation of the previous night to be all a dream, until I looked over at my desk chair. It was exactly in the spot where Miss Nagato had left it.


	2. Chapter 2

On Friday morning I briefly considered ditching Miss Yuki Nagato somehow, with either some sort of alternate route or by running uphill. I concluded that she might just keep up with me. The only thing worse than being seen walking to school with a monster girl, would of course being seen running to school with a monster girl running along after me. I gave her a ride to the station on the back of my bicycle and she kept by my side as we walked up the hill.

At her classroom door she whispered (far too loudly for my nerves), "Kyon, I will see you in the clubroom this afternoon, and then we can walk to our home together later." She bowed to me and turned to her class.

Everybody in Nagato's class seemed to be watching me, so I hurried away.

As I entered my classroom I was at least comforted that this day couldn't get any worse, as Nagato's threat to seduce me would only apply tonight at the earliest.

I just taken my seat when Haruhi Suzumiya leaned over her desk from behind me. "He's here!"

"Who is here?" I took out my books for first period then put my bag on my desk peg.

"The mysterious transfer student!"

"And what makes him so mysterious?" I turned towards her, but as usual avoided looking directly into her unsettling, insane gaze.

"He transferred from a Catholic school. Can you imagine what he'd have to do to get kicked out of a Catholic school?"

"Insult a nun?"

"Oh, be serious." She pointed at me.

At least she kept quiet during classes and then ran off to meet with this new student at lunch. My friend Kunikida was brave enough to take Haruhi's seat and we ate on her desk.

Kunikida was as sharp as usual. "Who's the girl who walked to school with you today?"

"Yuki Nagato. She's an orphan we took in at my house."

"Is she your girlfriend?"

"She's in mourning." Keeping up Haruhi's lie seemed to be the only way to avoid the sorry truth.

"Oh. Well at least Taniguchi seems to have a new girlfriend."

I glanced over my shoulder and saw that our class representative, Ryoko Asakura, was eating lunch with Taniguchi, instead of her usual girl cronies. Then I turned back to Kunikida, "He was being a little chicken, so I pushed him into it. I hope it works out for him."

"As long as it's not a repeat of what happened to you in middle school."

I glared at Kunikida.

"Sorry." He pulled back.

I picked up my bento and transferred it to my own desk.

After classes I made my way to the Supernatural Phenomenon Research Club room, opened the door and stopped.

Mikuru Asahina was taking off her blouse and I could see her bra. She froze and looked at me.

"Excuse me!" I dashed outside, closed the clubroom door and stood next to it.

A minute later I heard her voice, "Kyon, it's safe for you to come inside now."

For the briefest moment an alternative meaning for her words crept into my head, but I banished it. As I walked in I saw that Mikuru had changed to her miko uniform and that our resident monster girl, Miss Nagato, was curled up in her comfy chair again and was reading another of the old books from the club bookshelves. She was still in her school uniform, jacket and all, with her school shoes under her chair.

"Why the change of outfits?" I asked Mikuru.

"She insisted."

Mikuru didn't have to say which 'She', and that 'She' soon arrived with another student in tow. It was that Catholic school student, Itsuki Koizumi. In spite of this being his first day, he had our official school uniform on. The only difference between the way he wore it, and our often ignored regulations, was the silver chain and cross around his neck.

Itsuki's perfect smile only slipped for a moment, as his gaze fastened onto Miss Nagato. Then that plastic smile returned as he patiently listened to Haruhi's usual spiel about looking for creatures from out of time, from other worlds, or with strange abilities. In spite of her invitation, he agreed to join.

I resisted the temptation to point towards the shortest occupant of the room, who was sitting in the largest chair in the room, and shout to Haruhi, "Look! There! That is the strange creature you are looking for!" It wasn't that Miss Nagato was a guest in my home, but more along the lines of my having tried and failed to get this point across to Haruhi before.

Haruhi then walked to the computer desk and stood on the office chair she had swiped, along with the other computer gear, from the terrorized computer club. She looked us over for a moment, then recited our minuscule successes and ordered that we meet at nine a.m. the next morning at the train station to go hunt for mysteries beyond human understanding.

For once I was relieved that somebody had forced an early weekend appointment on me. This meant that I at least had an excuse to go to sleep early on Friday night, by myself.

After the meeting, Miss Nagato was as good as her word and walked alongside me. I couldn't complain too much. We were going to the same house after all. I felt the glances of the other students on us and then an especially strong feeling from behind. I glanced back and saw Miss Asakura, who suddenly turned away and started walking in another direction.

Miss Nagato had stopped at the same time I had and then continued alongside me for a few steps before whispering in her usual horse voice, "She knows."

Well of course Miss Asakura knew. The one and only person, outside my family, who couldn't tell at a glance that Miss Nagato was not human, was the one who said she was looking for monsters, our Miss Haruhi Suzumiya.

Miss Nagato continued to follow me inside my house. I turned at my door to block her way. "This is my room. Why are you following me?"

"Your mother said that you needed help with your schoolwork."

I wondered if the problem would be more my inability to concentrate on my studies alone in my room with her, or her own agenda for activities to do. I shouted across our living room, "Sis, do you have homework this weekend?"

"I'll do it on Sunday." My sister didn't look away from the television.

"Miss Nagato has time to help you with it now."

"Oh!" My sister clicked the TV off with the remote and ran up to grab our guest by the hand, "Thank you, big sister Yuki!"

Alone for the moment at least, I made a silent prayer for my sister's soul, then started on my homework, lest it become a later excuse to invade my only sanctuary.

As I was washing up after dinner, Miss Nagato entered the bathroom. Neither of us made any move to cover ourselves. I didn't see anything on her that was clearly inhuman. Her silver-gray hair color matched top and bottom (if a bit sparse below) and her eyes where unusually large, behind the only thing she wore, her glasses. But all the parts of her looked human, if a little young to be a high school girl. Her gaze seemed not to wander from my face.

"Well?" I asked her. "Didn't you just bathe with my sister?"

"I am still recovering from my nap, and need to soak some more please. I don't take much space in the tub, and I can help wash your back."

"You can soak all night after I am done here. Now leave me alone. I need to sleep tonight so I can make the brigade meeting in the morning."

"As you wish." She turned and left. Even her backside seemed perfectly normal for a junior high aged girl, not that I had ever seen one in anything less than a swimsuit of course. I found her exotic nature more frightening than stimulating and quickly rinsed off, then soaked myself only briefly.

In the morning I went to the bathroom to relieve myself and saw that the tub was still filled. I looked in it and saw Miss Nagato lying under the water. She opened her eyes, sat up out of the water and said, "Good morning," in her usual hoarse whisper. She felt along the side of the tub for her glasses and put these on.

I said nothing and simply watched as she got out of the tub and picked up a towel. There were no wrinkles on her body, front or back, face, fingers or toes.

I decided to set out early, but Miss Nagato was already ready, in her school uniform. Was my mom too cheap to buy her anything else? By reflex I reached for my bicycle then stopped and looked at her.

"Go ahead," she said, "I am much refreshed now and can keep up."

Yeah, monster girl running along behind or beside my bicycle. "The station isn't that far. We can walk."

"As you wish." She walked alongside me, keeping to my pace by making more frequent steps with her shorter legs.

Because I was on foot, it took me longer than usual to reach the station, and we arrived only five minutes before nine.

"You're late, Kyon." Haruhi stood in front of Itsuki and Mikuru, her finger pointed at me like a gun.

"It's still five minutes before the time we were supposed to meet."

"The last one to arrive is always late. So you're treating the rest of us at the cafe."

"How about Miss Nagato? She came here at exactly the same time as I did."

"She got burned out of her home and so doesn't have any money. It's your treat, Kyon."

Did Haruhi really believe her own lie?

At the cafe Haruhi revealed her plans to split into two groups to search around the train station. Mikuru and I drew the colored toothpicks, and after a warning from Haruhi that this was not a date, we set off.

Rather than go searching in dark places for secrets I was beginning to suspect might just exist, I led Mikuru to the nearby park.

"This is my first time." She said.

"Yes?"

"To be walking like this, alone with a boy."

"Don't worry, there's plenty of people around here. And don't worry about me. My mom would kill me if I shamed the family name by despoiling a miko." For the briefest moment the image of her opened blouse and the double meaning of what she had said afterwards crept back into my head, but I shook free of it.

"I have some information that you may find difficult to believe."

"There are plenty of things I see with my own eyes these days that I find very difficult to believe. What do you have?"

"Your friend, Yuki Nagato, is a kappa."

"Just because she lives with us, does not make her my girlfriend. But, yes I can believe that whatever it is that she is, has been called a kappa." I looked down into the creek. I saw plants and fish there, but no humanoid figures.

"We have detected a great evil at your high school."

"Who is this 'We'?" I noted, but didn't comment on, her self-exclusion from my school.

"The Jinja Honcho."

"So the rumors of their having an undercover arm?"

"Are still only rumors of course. Since you are aware of Miss Nagato's non-human nature, will you help us?"

"Sure? What's the plan, lure her somewhere and burn her? Somehow she doesn't even look bulletproof."

"No!"

"What?" I turned back to look Mikuru in the eyes.

Mikuru looked down at the path. "We want you to watch her, and report back through me, please."

"Why not knock her off?" I had almost said up, but caught myself in time.

"Here." Mikuru sat on a bench and indicated the space next to herself.

"Yes?" I sat next to her.

She looked off into the distance for a minute then turned to me and said, "Think of it this way. Suppose we knew of a street dealer of narcotics, but did not know the source of the drugs. What would you think might happen if we eliminated that dealer?"

"Another one would take his place and that organization would be warned. So you want me to help track Miss Nagato back to the source of her evil?"

"Yes. It would be helpful for you to gain her trust, but be careful that she does not seduce you into joining her evil."

"I was already on my guard, but thanks for the information."

"So you will consider our request?"

"Why me, and not say Haruhi?"

"See seems to be a bit unstable. Please do not tell her any of this."

My phone rang as Haruhi summoned us back. We had nothing we cared to reveal to her or the others, and so I was again assessed the late penalty and had to pay for lunch.

We split up again and this time I was pared with Miss Nagato.

As we walked along I considered the situation and decided to call her thin bluff. "So you waited in the clubroom for a decade?"

"I was too dried up and so slept through the event I had waited for, after the others did not return."

"So what, you were stuck in the clubroom with nowhere to go, like a fish out of water?"

"A curious phrase Kyon, but accurate."

"Where did you get the school uniform then?"

"The others provided it."

"And why didn't anybody else intrude in that room for ten years?"

"Only unusual types would have been able to find that room."

A door in a well traveled corridor and nobody tried the knob for a decade? This wasn't making any sense at all. I decided to try to see if I could be a little more friendly to the monster. "It must be boring to read the same old books there, year after year."

"Yes, but they are all that I have."

"Why not go to the library?"

"The library?"

"Here," I took her hand in mine and led her a few blocks to the local public library. Her hand was noticeably warmer than before, almost up to human levels this time.

She was stunned at the rows of books and so didn't resist as I pulled her along to the occult section. Then she let go of my hand, adjusted her glasses and stood up on tiptoes to examine the top shelf. "Junk, trash, debunked, useless, interesting!" She took that last book down from the shelf and went to a table to study it.

I went to the manga section and picked out a volume that was more relevant to my interests.

A while later, Haruhi called me and demanded we return instantly. I found that Miss Nagato had collected three books and couldn't be persuaded to leave them behind, so I helped her apply for a library card. At my address of course.

"So did you find anything?" Itsuki swatted me on the backside when we met again.

"What was that about?" Haruhi asked him.

"Just being friendly. We need to work together after all."

While Haruhi's glance was distracted to his face I felt my backside. There was now a folded piece of paper in my pants pocket. I left it there.

Back in my room that evening I took out the note that Itsuki had planted on me. It said to come alone at one p.m. on Sunday to a certain address. Well, why not? Everybody else wants to talk to me, after all.

That night Miss Nagato once again crept into my room in her bra, panties and glasses. She looked down at me for a moment and then sat in my desk chair and waited.

"First you said that there was no time, so why are you so eager to do me now?" I asked her in a whisper.

"The calculation changed. You follow Haruhi Suzumiya on the basis of your own reasoning, rather than out of fear or ideology."

"So what does that have to do with hooking up with me?"

"You humans have strong emotional bonds towards your relatives. As long as I was carrying one of your offspring, you would feel obligated to protect our child and therefore myself."

"So your plan is to blackmail me?"

"Blackmail?"

"Go to the cops, and say I forced you."

"That would be illogical. I am dependent on your protection and I have little recourse to the human authorities."

"So what makes you think I'm not gay?"

"Haruhi Suzumiya seems to be the cause of your depression."

"I mean, what if I were homosexual? Wouldn't that defeat your plan to seduce me?"

"The materials you have hidden in this room would suggest otherwise."

"Well forget it. I've no interest in having ugly kappa babies."

"Kappa is a prejudicial term. I can assure you that our offspring would pass as human on even close inspection for many decades. My own father was human, after all. You may touch and smell any part of my body to put your mind at ease about this."

"No thanks. Please leave my room and do not return without permission."

"As you wish." She stood up and bowed to me. "I look forwards to your reconsideration."

I studied her walk to my door in the gloom. There was something about the way she moved that was a little off, or was I just imaging that? Well I had to keep an eye on her anyway. So Haruhi had sent Miss Nagato to seduce me for some evil plan? If it were Haruhi herself I might be tempted, what with her looks and fuller figure. Miss Nagato appeared to be only a few years older than my sister, and so triggered in me only a general protective attitude towards children, even though she was probably much older than myself. Not that I knew much about kappa, of course.

On Sunday Miss Nagato followed me to our house door, but I said that she was not invited to the meeting I was going to and that she should stay and play with my sister and her friends.

"As you wish, and as you can see, I am at ease around human children. I will prove an acceptable mother."

I almost sighed. I took out my bicycle and on my way to the address Itsuki had given me I checked behind me twice, but found nobody following me.

The address turned out to be a Catholic church. There was a middle-aged man in a priest outfit or something and I told him I was there to see Itsuki Koizumi.

"Ah yes my son, right this way." The priest led me to a room in the back on the upper floor and knocked at a door that had one of those one-way looking telescopes in it.

"Yes?" Itsuki asked from inside.

"You have a visitor, Sir." The priest said.

"Very good." There was a sound of a lock being undone and then the door opened. "Kyon, how nice of you to come here today." He reached out and shook my hand then turned to the priest. "Thank you Father, that will be all for now."

"As you wish, Sir." The priest bowed to Itsuki, then turned and walked away.

What was Itsuki doing, ordering around a priest of at least twice his age?

Itsuki closed and locked the door behind me then sat in a chair behind a desk and indicated the chair in front of the desk for myself. The other furnishings in the room included a bookcase behind the desk, a pair of filing cabinets and a sofa. The sofa seemed to be of the sort that would unfold into a bed. I judged that when it did so it would take up most of the space in the room. I glanced down at the hardwood floor and thought I saw a few bits of dust at the places the supports for the bed would unfold to.

"Where does that go?" I pointed at the only other door in the room.

"It's my bathroom, shower and closet. Do you need to use the facilities?"

"No thanks. So this is quite a comfortable spread you've got here, Itsuki."

"I can't complain. It is much more than my usual cot in a dorm. We go where we are needed."

"So why did you invite me to your room?" And why lock the door behind me?

"We have detected a great evil centered on your school."

"Yeah, I heard this yesterday."

"From that pagan girl? Did she tell you that your friend, Yuki Nagato, is not human?"

"Yes, and just because Miss Nagato is living at my house, does not make her my girlfriend."

"Oh?" Itsuki's plastic smile wavered for a moment as he raised an eyebrow. "You had best see to it that the sea sprite, siren or mermaid as these things have been called, does not seduce you to your doom."

"I've checked quite closely. She has no tail."

"Well, not while walking on land of course."

"So you want me to keep an eye on her, until she leads us to the greater evil?"

"Ah? So our interests do coincide with those of the pagans for the moment after all?"

"Why didn't you ask Mikuru about that yourself?"

"There are certain restrictions. As you may have learned in your history classes, there has been some unpleasantness between our faiths here in Japan."

"So, is the entire Catholic Church in on your little conspiracy?"

"Not really. Should I fall, please contact somebody else in the Opus Dei. The Father here can lead you to them if asked. Anything else I can set your mind at ease about today?"

"No, I've got quite a bit to chew over already."

"We look forwards to your cooperation." Itsuki rose, shook my hand, opened the door then turned to me. "Have you had lunch already Kyon?"

"I think I need to get back home."

"You left the monster there?"

"Yes."

"That might be best then. Be seeing you."

I felt his eyes on me as I walked down the corridor, but as I turned to the stairs his door suddenly shut and I could hear him locking it from the inside.


	3. Chapter 3

On Sunday night I piled up a few books against my bedroom door, but they were still in place when I woke up Monday morning. It seemed that Yuki Nagato had obeyed my command to stay out of my room after all.

I also felt more rested, with the undisturbed sleep, and so I was in better spirits than previously, until I reached my classroom.

The bane of my existence, Haruhi Suzumiya, was sitting at her desk with arms crossed. Her glare followed me as I walked to my desk and she remained ominously silent until I had taken my seat.

"You failed me Kyon."

"What?" I turned towards her, trying to think of what her problem might be.

"Yesterday, I checked the sectors you said you had covered on Saturday. I saw several interesting items that you failed to report."

"Such as?"

"Isolated houses, dark alleys, places where children played."

"What does any of that have to do with the strange creatures you say you want to find?"

"We're not going to find our targets walking down the street. So our best bet is to find the humans that they prey on, and monitor those."

I supposed that either "He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster" or perhaps its reverse applied here.

"So we're going to do it again next weekend, and this time we will do it right. Do you understand me, Kyon?"

"Sure." I turned back to my desk.

I noticed the rest of the class quickly looking away from us. Our class representative, Ryoko Asakura was the last to turn away. Her eternal smile flicked into a scowl for just an instant, then locked back into place.

At lunch Haruhi went off to look for more members for her club, or perhaps more likely some victims I thought.

As I was eating, Asakura came over and leaned over my desk. She had her smile back so I wondered if she wanted me to feed her something from my bento.

"You failed her." Her whisper was a statement, not a question.

"Look, I don't think anybody knows what she wants."

"We shall discus this later." She grabbed my free hand, placed a note in my palm and folded my fingers over it.

The entire class watched Ryoko return to eating lunch with Taniguchi, and he seemed almost as confused as I myself was.

I took a moment to glance at the note she had surreptitiously passed to me. It read: "Return to this classroom at the end of the day, after all the other students have left."

At the Supernatural Phenomenon Research Club room that afternoon, Haruhi went over the results of our searches the previous weekend, along with her new potential victim finding routine.

When she saw that none of us were brave enough to offer any questions to her insanity, she came up with one of her own. "Yuki, I saw that you came to the hunt in your school uniform on Saturday. Don't you have anything else to wear?"

"No." Miss Nagato didn't look up from the book she was reading.

"Oh, it's because of that fire that killed your family. Well that outfit is just too easy to trace back to here, so I have to get you some new things. How about a catgirl maid outfit? Wouldn't that complement Mikuru's miko uniform nicely?" Haruhi pulled the book from Miss Nagato's hands, then lifted her out of her padded chair by her arms and pulled out a tape measure.

"We had best be going." Itsuki Koizumi grabbed my hand and pulled me from the clubroom.

Once we were outside I yanked my hand back and asked him. "What was that about?"

"Do you really want to know Miss Nagato's measurements?"

"No."

"Good boy. Be seeing you." He waved and walked off.

I thought about it for a moment, then decided to take up Ryoko on her invitation. Better to let her chew me out alone then have her assign me punishment duties in front of the entire class.

When I got to our classroom I found her standing there smiling and beckoning me over.

Perhaps this wouldn't be so bad after all, I thought as I walked over to her.

"You seem to be getting a little too close to Yuki Nagato."

"What?" I tried to ponder why Ryoko would make such a statement. "Is she a friend of yours?"

"No." Ryoko flipped up her skirt and unholsted a pair of sharp tipped scissors from the side of her panties.

My gaze was so focused on her unmarked thigh, as I wondered how she had managed to avoid scratching herself, that I didn't respond quickly enough to keep her from stabbing me in the abdomen.

"Die!" She twisted the scissors in my wound.

"Ow!" I stumbled backwards with my hands clutched at my gut as blood gushed out and fell backwards onto the floor. My head hit hard and I was stunned.

Ryoko knelt down over me and yanked out the scissors. "Now to finish you off."

She was so intent on finding the next place to stab me, that she never noticed the gloved pair of hands that reached from behind to twist her head to an unnatural angle. Her neck gave way with a loud crack and she collapsed on top of me.

I looked up at my savior. It was Itsuki.

"Suffer not a witch to live." He whispered, smiled, stood, turned away from me, kicked the open door three times loudly, then moved to the side of the classroom.

"What's going on in here?" Taniguchi entered the classroom and then stopped at the sight before him. "Kyon? Ryoko!" He ran in and grabbed her lifeless body. "Kyon you bastard! How dare you make a suicide pact with my girlfriend!"

Taniguchi was so intent on Ryoko that he didn't even notice Itsuki leave and then reenter the room.

"What's going on here?" Itsuki made an act of looking around the room, without his gloves. "Somebody call the emergency number!"

At that point everything faded to black.

"Ph'nglui mglw'nafh C'thulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn."

That was Miss Nagato's hoarse whisper, wasn't it? What on Earth was she saying? I opened my eyes and turned my head towards her.

She had been reading from a book to my sister, but now she looked up at me.

My sister followed her gaze and sprinted the two steps to my side. "Kyon! You're alive!"

"Apparently. Where are we?" I looked around a sparsely furnished room.

"At a private Catholic hospital!" Haruhi threw open the door to my hospital room with Itsuki and Mikuru behind her. "Thanks to deputy brigade leader Itsuki, who was able to get you a private room here rather than having you go to a public hospital. The local media is all over this story. Kyon, I warned you, and then you had to go and do this."

"Uncover a great mystery for you?"

"What mystery? It's the typical story of how a jilted girl commits a murder/suicide. I've never gone that far, but I know how Ryoko must have felt when you turned her down. Kyon, you heartbreaker. I don't know if Yuki even feels safe in your house anymore."

"I am comfortable around Kyon." Miss Nagato stood.

Yeah, a bit too comfortable. Help yourself to the boy of the house, why don't you?

"Don't take away big sister Yuki!" My little sister complained to Haruhi.

"Don't worry. I won't take away your friend." Haruhi bent down to play with my sister's hair. The look she had in her eyes, it stirred fears in my mind that I dared not even put thoughts to.

"How long will I be here?"

Haruhi turned her unsettling gaze from my sister to me. "Just a few more days. It wasn't all that serious. But you will miss Asakura's funeral tomorrow. A pity, as I'm sure she would have wanted you next to her at this time."

Yeah, lying next to her in another casket.

"Now, let's all go and give Kyon a chance to rest up." Haruhi grabbed my sister's hand.

"I'll get Kyon a newspaper to read."

"Okay, Itsuki. We'll wait for you in the lobby." Haruhi ushered the group out.

Itsuki returned alone with a newspaper. The headline was "One student dead in suicide pact".

"As if my life wasn't crummy enough. Why did you do all this?" I asked Itsuki.

"You've been most helpful to us. You've already revealed one of the cultists. Do keep up the good work." He waved and left, with his smile intact.

A while later a nun-psychiatrist came to interview me. She concluded that I wouldn't be a danger to myself and so could be released, but she seemed to avoid my gaze.

Yeah, yeah. I was to be released out into a world that was suddenly filled with unknown dangers.

Two days later, on Thursday afternoon, my mother came to pick me up. We rode home in silence. My mother was thinking about something, but she waited until we were all seated at the dinner table before bringing it up.

"Well, Kyon."

"Yes?" Now even she was using that nickname?

"You know I'm not one to pry into your affairs, but this thing with Miss Asakura. It was a bit much."

"Sorry." I looked down at the table.

"After all, you've got a much nicer girl right here. Yuki, you don't have a boyfriend, do you?"

"No, Ma'am." The monster girl responded to my mother.

"And my boy here, has he ever been unkind to you?"

"No, he's been most helpful, Ma'am."

"Don't you think he'd be a fine husband?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

"Do you mind if we go shopping for engagement rings for you two on Saturday?"

"I have no other plans, Ma'am."

"Please, call me mother from now on, Yuki."

"Yes, Mother."

"You're getting engaged?" My little sister hopped out of her chair and jumped into Miss Nagato - strike that - It was Yuki from now on, as my mother seemed intent on moving Nagato to a middle name at best. My little sister jumped into "my beloved monster fiancee" Yuki's lap and said, "Now we can be sisters forever!"

"We'll schedule the wedding for just after they graduate from high school, so you don't mind Yuki staying in your room for the next three years?"

"No, no. It's great to finally have a sister to talk to all the time!" My little sister beamed while Yuki patted her head.

Yuki seemed to be pleased with herself, with this victory, but she'd have to wait a few years before claiming her spoils.

That evening as I was washing up, Yuki once again entered the bathroom, naked.

"What are you doing in here?" I asked.

"Now we are a couple."

"Not yet. My mother has only decided that you will be part of her family in three years time. So get out."

"No."

"No?"

"I will wait until you are reconciled to the facts, and then I will brief you on the situation." She pulled up the second stool and sat cross-legged, with everything on display.

I decided to ignore her. I finished washing, rinsed off and got in the tub. As I was sitting there soaking, she was washing herself. As she started rinsing, I got out of the tub.

"You seem to be excited about something." Her gaze was level from where she sat to just below my waist.

"Just leave me alone." I picked up a towel and wrapped it around myself, not even looking back as I heard her lower herself into the tub.

On my desk I found handouts from class and in my desk drawer I found a pack of condoms, with a note from my mother explaining that while she was looking forwards to grandchildren, she wanted us to finish our educations first, please.

I thought I had been fortunate enough that at least my sister hadn't seen that note, until she pulled me aside the next morning.

"I know Mom doesn't want any grandkids yet, but it wouldn't bother me, Kyon."

On the way to school I hoped I imagined that Yuki was almost skipping alongside me.

We got to the shoe lockers at the same time as Kunikida. He looked at us for a moment then said. "It almost looks like you're a couple now."

"No."

"Yes." Yuki blushed as she ever so faintly smiled.

I turned to Yuki and said. "Don't contradict me around other people."

"Yes, Dear."

"And call me Kyon, just like everybody else does."

"Yes, Kyon."

Fortunately Kunikida didn't comment about this to my face. It would be interesting to see how fast the news traveled, and a good test of his friendship.

In the classroom Taniguchi glared at me once, then looked away for the rest of classes. Haruhi seemed pleased with herself for some reason and then insisted that I eat lunch with her.

Yuki came to our classroom door with her bento, saw me and Haruhi together, then walked away.

In the clubroom that afternoon, Haruhi went over her plans to locate easy to abduct victims the next day. "So, any questions? Yes, Yuki?"

"Kyon and I can't go tomorrow."

"And why not?"

"Because we're getting engaged." Yuki leaned over and wrapped both of her arms around one of mine. As if her sitting at the table next to me instead of in her usual comfy chair wasn't a big enough clue.

"What!" The other three brigade members said in almost unison and with apparently equal amounts of outrage.

Haruhi got up, stormed around the table and pulled me away from Yuki's grasp by my necktie, "Cancel. Brigade business is more important."

For the first time I found the courage to look back directly into her eyes. "Sorry, but I can't do that. I owe my Mom after that mess with Miss Asakura. I don't like it, but an engagement is exactly the thing needed to throw off the rumors that have started swirling around my family." The rumors that started when you roped me into this, Haruhi.

Haruhi stared into my eyes for ten more seconds, lightly bit her lip, then released me and turned around. "It can't be helped then. We'll do the patrol on Sunday. We meet on Sunday at one p.m., to give Itsuki time to get there after church. Yuki." Haruhi turned to her with an all too familiar gleam in her eyes.

"Yes?"

"I've got a gift for you!" Haruhi put a paper bag on the table and pulled out some black clothing. "Now strip!"

"As you wish," Yuki stood and started taking off her jacket.

Itsuki grabbed me by the arm and pulled me from the clubroom.

A few minutes later Mikuru invited us back in and we saw that Yuki was indeed dressed as a catgirl maid. In addition to a minimal black french maid dress with fishnet stockings and fur covered high heel boots, it had cat features such as a headband with cat ears, a black cat tail that dropped down below her knees and even tufts of black fur on the hand tops of her elbow length fingerless gloves. The apron and some of the trim was white, but otherwise it was an all-black outfit, a striking contrast against her pale skin.

"So what do you think?" Haruhi held Yuki's right hand over her head and spun her around.

"An amazing choice." Itsuki somehow managed to keep up his eternal smile. "You've got quite a future waiting for you as a fashion designer."

"Sorry Kyon, but I had to have her remove her bra. Should I get her a strapless bra? Do you really think she needs the support?" Haruhi reached from behind and put her hands on Yuki's chest.

Yuki squirmed as Haruhi tightened her fingers, but voiced no protest.

"Don't bother." I sat down so I could look away.

"Now Yuki, show us how it works. Serve us all tea." Haruhi took the seat next to mine. "And Yuki."

"Yes, Ma'am?"

"You need to wear your official outfit to every SOS Brigade meeting from now on, just as Mikuru wears her miko uniform."

"As you say, Ma'am." Yuki bowed to Haruhi.

"So where is your outfit?" I asked Haruhi.

"On backorder, I'm afraid. Not many Japanese girls of my age can match my figure. It's so much easier shopping for Yuki. Don't worry, you'll see it soon."

On the walk back home I asked Yuki (once again back in her school uniform and usual shoes), "how did you keep your balance in those heels?"

"I have excellent reflexes, Kyon. Shall I show you tonight?"

"No thanks." I banished the image of Yuki squirming in Haruhi's grasp from my mind. They had both seemed to enjoy that far too much.

That evening as we sat down for dinner, our doorbell rang. I opened the door and found Haruhi standing there.

"Hi Kyon, is your mother in?"

My mom looked out of the dinning room. "Yes, what is it?"

"Oh Mother!" Haruhi ran to and hugged my mom. "You simply must call off this engagement."

"Why?"

"I'm afraid that Miss Nagato is of ..." Haruhi paused artfully, then continued, "foreign blood."

"What, Korean or something? Can you prove this?"

"No, I'm afraid the records were all destroyed in the fire."

"Was Yuki at least born in Japan?"

"Why yes, sixty four years ago."

Yuki's eyebrows shot up at this, but she quickly recovered.

"I guess that explains her gray hairs then." My mom smiled and looked over at me. "Kyon, you've got some great friends to make such jokes." Then she turned back to Haruhi. "Can you stay for dinner, Miss?"

"Haruhi Suzumiya, and of course Mother. If it's no problem?"

Haruhi took the spot next to my Mom and continued to call her Mother for no damn good reason for the rest of the meal.

That night Yuki came to my room again, but at least this time she wore pajamas.

I waited for her to sit at desk chair and turn to face me before I whispered, "I told you to stay out of my room."

"I think these chats are most helpful. They let us keep each other up to date, since we are fiancees after all."

"So what was it about the sixty four years that got to you?"

"Miss Suzumiya miscounted. I'm only sixty three. My birthday isn't until March first of next year."

"So you are a Pisces?"

"Human astrologers have not kept track of the precession of the equinoxes. It's a part of the shortsightedness that comes from your limited lifespans. Don't worry, unlike a human woman of my age, I am just now entering my most fertile years which will extend to a little past one hundred, then slowly decline down to almost nothing in the low thousands. By the standards of my race it would be a little unseemly for me to breed so young."

"So you are physically and socially the equivalent of a junior high school girl?"

"A crude analogy, but mostly correct."

"How does Haruhi know your approximate age so well?"

"She must have her sources. This raises the risks for us both."

My phone buzzed on my desk. Yuki picked it up and answered it. "Hello? Yes, he's right here." She handed the phone to me.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"You really aren't taking this seriously, are you?" Itsuki asked.

"Why are you calling me in the middle of the night?"

"Things that go bump in the dark tend to do so during nighttime hours. I'd like to show you some of them. I'm sorry to pull you away from the sticky tendrils of your fiancee, but please meet me in front of your house in ten minutes. And leave the Misses at home please. Some of my friends don't like her kind very much."

I looked up and saw that Yuki was already at my door.

"Stay safe, Dear." She closed the door after herself as silently as usual.

I turned on my light and got dressed.

I had just closed the house door behind me when a delivery van pulled up in front of my house. Itsuki opened the side door and gestured for me to get in. The van pulled away as soon as I was inside. I saw that a half dozen grown men were with Itsuki and they all had combat armor, night vision goggles and each carried one or more large weapons, assault rifles, recoilless rifles, grenade launchers and even flamethrowers.

"Don't I get any toys?" I asked him.

"Here." Itsuki handed me a digital camera. "It's set for high resolution so save your shots for the enemy."

"What enemy?"

"Oh, you'll see." His smile was as fake and unrevealing as usual.

Thirty minutes later we arrived at the port and got out next to stacks of those huge cargo containers they load onto 18-wheeler trucks. Itsuki ordered the men to search and we were soon summoned to one container that stood by itself. As we approached, the door burst open and strange creatures emerged. They looked almost like starfish, except that they had six arms and each must have weighed at least 200 kg.

Itsuki's troops opened fire on the creatures with limited effect. I started taking pictures. Twenty minutes later my camera was full and the monsters were all dead.

Itsuki grabbed my shoulder and turned me back to the van.

"What about your men?" I asked.

"Oh, they'll be busy with the cleanup for a while. I thought it best to get you back home so you can be rested for your big day tomorrow. Got to be your best, when you set down for a lifetime with a monster."

"What were those things?"

"Illegal aliens. They get smuggled into the country from time to time."

"What do you expect me to do with these pictures?"

"I think you might know a certain brigade leader, who has an interest in such things."

"Won't that blow up all your careful plans?"

"Not particularly."

On Saturday my newly enlarged family went down to the jewelers. Because of budget issues, and so as to not draw too much attention at school, we settled on identical plain gold bands for Yuki and myself. Then we went and registered the engagement.

When we met on Sunday, Haruhi frowned at the rings that Yuki and I wore.

I handed her the camera. "Look what I did on Friday night."

She clicked through the photos then handed the camera back to me. "Obviously photo edited. Don't waste my time with such nonsense again. And you even edited poor Itsuki's face into one of the photos. Shame on you, Kyon."

Mikuru, who had seen the photos over Haruhi's shoulder, looked up at Itsuki with wide eyes.

He smiled.


	4. Chapter 4

At the cafe on Sunday, Haruhi made me delete the photos of actual strange creatures from the camera that Itsuki had given me, in order to make room for our real work that day.

"Okay here are the two sectors we'll search this afternoon." Haruhi spread out two maps of the city that were identical, except that each had a different section outlined in pencil. "We'll split into two groups, one for each sector, and search these areas for the likely victims of the monsters."

"Yeah, yeah. So let's draw toothpicks again." I reached for the toothpicks holder.

Haruhi shook her head. "No Kyon, you already messed up twice before. This time I'm putting you under Itsuki, so you can finally learn something. You've proven you know how to point a camera so you just take pictures, while Itsuki leads the way, interviews the future victims, and takes notes."

So my supposedly faked photos are now supposed to show that I'm good with a camera? Once again Haruhi's logic was so difficult to follow that it might as well have come from different people mixed together.

"That leaves you two girls with me. Yuki, how's your vision on land?" Haruhi examined the glasses worn by my monster fiancee, who was sitting next to me.

Wait, did Haruhi just admit that she knew of Yuki's non-human nature?

"My glasses correct sufficiently."

"No need to take the risk of misfocus. All those decades of reading should indicate some ability to write, so you'll be our note taker. Mikuru is too clumsy to be trusted with the camera so she'll be the face for our team to interview people. Well, any questions?" Haruhi looked around, but none were offered. "Okay Itsuki, pick your map."

"I'll take this one." He picked up the map with the marked region closer to his church.

"We'll meet back here at five." Haruhi set off with Mikuru and Yuki in tow.

We walked the other direction for a while, then I turned to Itsuki. "Do you think Mikuru will be safe with those two?"

"I doubt they'll reveal their true colors so early. The stars are not yet right."

"Haruhi knows everything, you know. She came storming over to my house on Friday night and guessed Yuki's age to within one year."

"It's Yuki now, instead of Miss Nagato?" Itsuki smiled as he checked the map then turned right.

"Yeah, yeah. So she's a monster. She's also my fiancee."

"So what has your fiancee told you about her kind?"

"She's demonstrated a lot, but said very little. She's hinted that more information will be forthcoming, once I put out for her." I thought back over all the times that Yuki had flaunted her naked or barely dressed body in front of me.

"Actually a rather tempting offer, but it is your soul on the line. Before you accept, I should tell you that they are all half-human widows."

"Widows?" I stopped for a moment, then hurried to catch up with him.

"Only daughters are born to the sea-witches, and their tradition is to devour the fathers of their daughters, on the night of conception."

"Aren't I a little big for Yuki to wolf down in a single meal?"

"They invite their relatives to the party."

Itsuki led me to selected homes in the outlined area and he was welcomed at them by people who knew him and tended to also wear Christian crosses. His notes bore little relation to the actual residents.

As we were heading back I asked him. "Do you feel okay about all this? What happens if one of your friends gets attacked?"

"Wouldn't that be an interesting coincidence?" He looked at me and smiled.

As I walked back home later with my "sea-witch" fiancee, I decided to test her against this latest fact. "So, what was your father like?"

Yuki glanced at me, then looked down at the sidewalk. "Papa was very kind to me. The first time I was ever told that I wasn't entirely human was when he sat down with me and my mother and they both carefully explained to me the things I had to do to keep from being noticed for what I was."

"So, whatever happened to him?"

"I don't know. My last memory of him was when I was ten. The two of them had been crying and then my mother took me and we traveled a very long way on a train. It's been fifty three years, so I suppose he must be dead by now, if he indeed survived the night." Yuki gently sighed.

Her act, if that's what it was, was starting to get to me. I harded my heart and continued. "Your night vision is excellent. An adaption for living at the bottom of the ocean? What's it like down there?"

"I don't know. I've never been to the ocean. Once we are closer, I will burden you with the secret as to why that is."

I didn't know which way to respond at that point so I simply opened the door to our house and stood aside so she could enter first.

Inside, my little sister was playing a video game and she invited "Big-sister Yuki" to play with her. I had homework to do and so didn't dwell on the loss of the final bit of my big-brother status. At least I could take comfort in the fact that my sister wouldn't sever all ties to Yuki's husband. Assuming that I wasn't devoured by sea-witches on my honeymoon of course.

Monday afternoon in the clubroom, Itsuki was typing in the data we had "gathered" as I read it out. Yuki was wearing her cat maid outfit while sitting in her comfy chair (even Haruhi seemed loathe to take that away from her) and reading another book from the library, while Haruhi sat at the table and studied the maps. Was she plotting quick getaway routes or what?

The door opened and Mikuru said from outside, "This way please."

Another girl who also wore a sophomore uniform followed her into the room. She had green eyes and also green hair.

I glanced at Yuki and then back at this new girl. If it was a dye job then it was very good indeed. If it was natural, well at least she seemed to be able to see her way around without thick glasses like Yuki's.

Haruhi quickly folded up the maps and turned to the newcomer. "Hello, how can we help you, Miss?"

"Emiri Kimidori. And I hope you can help me, because everything else has failed."

"You've come to the right place then. I'm Haruhi Suzumiya and you will find that my SOS Brigade is very unusual. Please, have a seat." Haruhi clapped twice. "Yuki, some tea for our guest please."

"As you wish, Ma'am." Yuki put aside her book and rose to her maid duties.

Miss Kimidori said that her boyfriend had been missing for several days and that nobody had taken her inquiries seriously.

"This is precisely the kind of case we've been preparing for." Haruhi turned to me. "You see, my dear Watson, the game is afoot."

So now she thinks she's Sherlock Holmes? I may have sighed, but I said nothing.

Haruhi turned back to our first ever client. "So Miss Kimidori, how did you find us?"

"It was my boyfriend himself. You see, he would mention you in his, er, sleep. He would suddenly shout things like 'the SOS Brigade', 'those eyes, those monstrous eyes', and such. I would appreciate it if those details were never released."

"Oh, we are the very souls of discretion. Still it seems a bit odd."

"But his computer club is just down the corridor. He's the president of that club."

Haruhi sent Miss Kimidori on her way and led the brigade to the address given us. We followed her up the stairs to the apartment in question and then she kicked the door in.

I stood there stunned for a moment, then found my voice. "Why didn't you knock first?"

"Oh, do be sensible Kyon. The door was locked of course." Haruhi marched in and the rest of us followed her.

I stopped to look at the ruined door. It had indeed been locked, with even the deadbolt in place. How had Haruhi broken through with just one kick?

"Kyon, quick take a photo of this!"

I hurried to her side and saw that Haruhi was pointing at a large roughly circular pattern. Was that drawn in blood with the outstretched fingers of one hand?

No sooner had I taken the photo, than Haruhi grabbed the camera out of my hands.

"Good job Kyon. See how it spells out SOS? This is going to be so great on our homepage."

"What?" I assumed she must be kidding, or at least I silently prayed that she was.

"What are you kids doing?"

I turned to look to the corridor. There was a middle aged man looking aghast at the damage Haruhi had caused to the door.

"Are you the lazy, good for nothing, manager of this building?"

"Yeah, who are you lot?"

Had he even heard Haruhi's question?

"One of your renters has been abducted! Just look at this message he left." She pointed down to the mysterious sign.

The manager wanted the police to arrest us all for breaking and entering, but Haruhi managed to shift the suspicion onto him for not reporting the abduction earlier.

The Tuesday morning paper's headline read: "Another North High School student missing!"

My little sister looked up from the newspaper section that my father had placed on the table as he turned to the sports section. "Big-sister Yuki, I'm so worried for you."

"Don't worry, little-sister. Kyon will protect me."

My little sister turned to me for the first time in days. "Promise me, Kyon. Promise you won't let anything happen to Big-sister Yuki."

"I promise."

On the way to school, I reached for my little sister, but she took my offered hand and put it in Yuki's, before taking Yuki's other hand in hers.

When I got to the clubroom after classes I found a note on the door from Haruhi. She had a meeting with the school authorities and so the club meeting for today was canceled. I turned away with Yuki following and stopped.

Fellow club member Mikuru Asahina was standing right in front of Yuki. "You went to the search on Sunday in your school uniform. Did Haruhi only buy you that maid outfit?"

I turned to Yuki. I was so used to seeing her in her school uniform that I hadn't even noticed that she really didn't really have anything much of anything else, escpecially with her habit of shedding almost everything whenever we were alone.

Yuki nodded.

"Come along then and we'll get you some outfits you can wear on dates. You are engaged after all." Mikuru reached for Yuki's hand.

"Sorry, but we're broke." I held up my hand to show my engagement ring.

"It's okay, I can pay. And Yuki, can we take Kyon along so that he can carry the bags?"

"Of course."

Mikuru led us down the hill to the train station and then two stops later we got off at the shopping district.

The sales lady noticed Yuki's ring, was about to ask about it, but then spotted my ring. She nodded and began to make suggestions, which Miruku joined in.

As Yuki was changing into the first selection that had been made for her, I sat down next to Mikuru and whispered to her, "If the kappa are all female, then why spread the rumor that they're all male?"

"Yuki won't look like that forever. Give her a few thousand years and she'll be all scaly, with webbed fingers and toes. It took us a few centuries to find out that young kappa could easily pass as human girls, and by that point the folklore had already been set."

"So why are you being helpful to Yuki? Is this just a ploy to get her to trust you, so you can destroy her?"

"It is the Western way to seek out and destroy all monsters. The way of Shinto is to find a common existence with the kami. We have to judge each case. Like men, not all kappa are evil. Yuki is an odd case. As far as we can determine she has never gone to sea, and she has never tasted human flesh. But Kyon, there is one thing I'd thought you'd know by now. While the kappa have poor vision on land, they retain their excellent hearing." Mikuru turned to the changing stall and continued without raising her voice. "You finished changing a few minutes ago, so let's see what you look like, Yuki."

The latch of the changing stall slid open and Yuki stepped out in the new outfit, with a hurt look on her face.

"Oh poor thing. Did I just ruin one of the surprises you were keeping for your fiancee?" Mikuru made a point of not raising her voice above the whisper level I had initiated.

Yuki walked over and said in her usual hoarse whisper, "I am not a kappa."

"Then what does your kind call itself?"

I risked a glance over at Mikuru. She seemed really pleased about maneuvering things to this point.

Yuki made her usual fish-eyed stare at Mikuru. "Your ears would need to be underwater and my throat would need to be filled with water, submerged together in a pond or something. And even then most of our name would be outside the range of human hearing. The closest translation in Japanese to our name would be The Deep Ones."

"We thought that only applied to the eldest of your race?"

"We make no such distinction."

"One final clarification, if you don't mind?"

"Go ahead." To anybody else, Yuki's huge eyes would seem as emotionless as a fish, but I could see the hint of anger behind them.

"The cause of your mother's death?"

"She was hunted down as a heretic to our race. I learned later that her sacrifice was to give me time to escape." Yuki turned to me. "And that Kyon, is the reason I must avoid the ocean. It's family politics."

"So you see Kyon, just like you, Yuki has lost a loved one." Mikuru smiled at me for a moment, then dropped the smile as she saw my expression.

"Miss Sasaki was no more my girlfriend than Miss Asakura was. I thought Sasaki was a close friend. I was the only student in our school who would entertain her so-called 'logical' reasoning. Then one day she said she saw something horrible in my eyes and asked me to please sit still while she cut them out. Sometimes I wish I'd taken her up on her kind offer. As far as I know she's still alive, if you call being locked up like that living." I turned back to my fiancee. "So Yuki, do you want to cry on my shoulder? That's what my Mom's hired me out for."

Yuki's gaze softened and it took every bit of my knowledge of her non-human nature to keep from falling for her as she continued in a slightly gentler tone. "No, I understand now. I will wait until you are ready. I was truly unaware of your circumstances. Perhaps if we both survive what is to come..." The Yuki turned back to address Mikuru with her standard horse whisper. "So Miss Asahina, is this charade over?"

"What? No, cheer up! You look lovely in that outfit, doesn't she, Kyon? And you've got three more to try on. You can have them all if you like."

In the end Yuki did take all four outfits, and some advice from Mikuru about how to mix certain parts together for greater variety. As I carried the packages I went over them all in my head and still couldn't shake the impression they gave Yuki of being a middle school student in casual clothes with unusual hair and eyes. I would have suggested adding a hat and sunglasses, but I didn't want that to be taken as a disparagement of her looks, rather than a disguise to throw her relatives off the trail that led to my house. So my "fiancee" was the blood enemy of human-eating monsters. Did that automatically make her my friend? It was a point I'd have to consider.

When we got home, my sister was overjoyed to be able to play fashion show with her supposed future sister-in-law.

Wednesday morning Yuki and I dropped my sister off at her school, bicycled to the station, walked up the hill to North High, then entered the school's courtyard.

"You monster!"

I turned to Taniguchi, but he walked past me to stand in front of Yuki.

"You're as cold blooded as a kappa. Getting engaged to Kyon right after he killed my poor Ryoko. Grave digger!"

I put my arm between the two of them. "You don't have a problem with my fiancee. You've got a problem with me, Taniguchi. So take it up with me."

"It's this fish eyed monster. She's the one who put you up to it. So I'm going to get some answers out of her, here and now."

Yuki backed up and I moved between the two.

Taniguchi turned to me. "Stay out of this, Kyon."

"I can't do that."

"Damn you!" He suddenly swung and hit me on the jaw.

Our Gym teacher grabbed him while I escorted Yuki inside.

"Does that hurt?" She asked.

"A bit. I'll go see the nurse."

I entered first period class ten minutes late, with a cold pack for my face. Taniguchi's seat was empty.

After the first teacher left, Haruhi said from behind me. "You got into a fight over Yuki? I didn't know that there were all that many boys who went for her kind."

I turned to her and tried to deflect the subject. "What happened with the school authorities yesterday?"

"Oh, students shouldn't try to solve crimes. How are we supposed to change the world, if they won't let us do anything?"

"Has the computer club president been found?"

"Of course not."

And how would you know what was likely or not in this case, Miss Suzumiya?

At lunchtime Yuki came over to our classroom, dropped her bento on my desk and turned to look for an available chair.

"Here." Haruhi picked up Yuki's bento and placed it on her own desk. "No meeting of brigade members without the brigade commander."

I turned my chair around and looked at her for a moment. Haruhi, if you follow us on our honeymoon, I'll ensure that you are the one who is thrown to the hungry kappas. Well fine, put this bee in your bonnet. "Yuki."

She brought a chair and set down next to us. "Yes, Kyon?"

"Do you have any plans for Friday night?"

"No."

"Then let's go out on a date. We'll set out from our house at seven p.m. sharp. Agreed?"

"Yes," both girls said in unison.

After classes I waited for the girls to change and then knocked before entering the clubroom.

Haruhi was sitting at the computer and pulled out a printed page. "You messed it up, Kyon." The printout was of my photo from the crime scene.

"What?"

"You got the angle and lighting all wrong. There's no way we can put this on our website."

"That's a relief." I took my seat.

"So I have to retrace the design in a graphics program. At least this way I'll be able to use the proper colors and include a box at the bottom for the brigade symbol."

I didn't ask her how she'd know what the 'proper' colors might be.


	5. Chapter 5

Taniguchi did not arrive at school on Thursday, an absence my class felt dearly when we lost the soccer match against Itsuki's class. I hoped it was just a suspension.

In the clubroom after classes Haruhi noted the lack of movement on her website's hit counter, even with the addition of the logo she had copied from the site of the abduction.

She scooted back from the computer and looked at me. "Kyon, it's all your fault of course."

"My fault?" I glanced at Mikuru and Itsuki, but they offered no support.

"You're such a lousy web designer that nobody will ever see my brilliant symbol."

How could it be hers if she copied it, unless the person she copied it from was herself?

"Let's see, who can I depend on..." Haruhi looked over the three of us, then shifted her gaze to the corner next to her. "Yuki."

"Yes?" Yuki continued to read from her book as she sat in her comfortable chair in her cat maid outfit.

"You don't know much about computers, do you?"

"No." Yuki continued to read her book.

"After all, they changed so much while you were taking your decade long nap, now didn't they? Put down the book and come over here."

Yuki placed a bookmark in the book, and left that in the chair. She rose and walked over to Haruhi.

"Sit here." Haruhi patted her own lap.

"As you wish, Ma'am." Yuki sat in her lap.

Haruhi rotated the office chair so they faced the computer. She grabbed Yuki's hands and placed them on the keyboard. "Do you know how to type in Japanese?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

"And here's how you use the mouse. Press this button to bring up a menu and this button to make selections." Haruhi ran her hand over Yuki's arm as she demonstrated the functions.

Then Haruhi stopped and turned Yuki's hand over and examined it. She ran her hands over Yuki's arms then brought them up and felt at Yuki's head. She continued her examination down Yuki's neck, shoulders, belly, hips, thighs and knees. Then she sniffed behind Yuki's ear. "Ah ha! Yuki, you still feel human, but you're starting to get a slight fishy odor." Haruhi looked up. "Mikuru, what could she use to mask that?"

"Any standard feminine deodorant should do for the next several decades."

"And after that point?"

"The physical changes would become too obvious for such a ruse."

"How about with dogs?"

"Their noses are too keen." Mikuru smiled. "Yuki, you already have problems with dogs, don't you?"

Yuki looked down. "I do my best to avoid them."

Haruhi took advantage of the new pose to lick along the side of Yuki's neck. "Your taste is also a tiny bit off."

"I'll be careful, Ma'am."

Haruhi frowned at this and clutched Yuki to her. "Why aren't you fighting me? Doesn't this bother you? We're right in front of your fiancee, after all."

Yuki turned around and Haruhi relaxed her grip just enough so that the smaller girl could sit sideways on her lap.

Yuki then looked at her. "The manga that Kyon hides contain quite a number of threesomes. If it engages his interest then I will certainly play along. I've endured much worse. Shall we kiss now, Ma'am? Or perhaps wait until we're alone with Kyon on our date tomorrow?"

Haruhi tossed Yuki out of her lap and then gave her a playful swat on the backside. "You're no fun."

Yuki turned around to face her. "Shall I pretend to resist, Ma'am? It's fine with me. Just so long as we leave no marks that will bring extra attention to our activities."

"With these two spies here?" Haruhi pointed at Mikuru and Itsuki. "No, you're right, Yuki. Let's save the fireworks for our three-way date tomorrow night. It won't be all Kyon's treat. I'll rent the love hotel room. In the meantime he can dream about what we will do there."

I flinched back from her insane smile. Wait, why would she (correctly) accuse the other two of being spies, since she herself was the one who dragged them into the clubroom?

"Yuki, I'm bored." Haruhi turned back to her. "Tell me a story."

"Shall I read from my book, Ma'am?"

"You do read a lot of that science fiction, don't you? No, tell me about your Kappa Kappa Kappa sorority. What sort of reindeer games do they exclude you from? What do they do there, at the bottom of the ocean? What are they planning?"

Yuki stood there for a moment. To most anybody else her glassy-eyed stare would have seemed completely devoid of emotion, but I could see the boiling anger and utter contempt behind her huge fishy eyes. Then she took one breath and relaxed. She smiled ever so faintly. "As you wish, Ma'am."

Haruhi looked up at Yuki as the two spies turned their attention to her.

Yuki walked over to the corner, picked up her book and put it to the side, then adjusted her padded chair so it faced out of its corner. She climbed up into it, resumed her usual cross legged position in it, adjusted her thick glasses and looked over all of us. Then she started to speak.

"My mother was not privy to the deepest secrets of our race and she clearly did not tell me all she knew. She told me that evolution could not have created the Deep Ones. We clearly came from human stock that had been artificially altered to suit the whims of parties unknown to her. Perhaps the deepest ones know and perhaps it is a secret that was never revealed to my race."

"Deepest ones?" Haruhi asked.

"My society is literally stratified. The older we become, the deeper the depth becomes where we are comfortable. Currently I would find the deepest depths of the ocean no more comfortable than any of you would. In several thousand years I will be unable to survive on the surface or in any part of the ocean shallow enough to admit sunlight. You are correct that my body will change. But, Kyon dear..."

"Yes?" What was I being singled out for?

"Unless some grave misfortune befalls me I will always look much better than a human wife of my same age would. It is not quite ageless beauty, but it is a great improvement on the century of decline a human woman would face, if she was lucky enough to live even that long."

"Except for the glasses." Haruhi pointed out.

Yuki turned to her. "Kyon's mangas have many glasses girls. I admit that they do tend to take those off, but at least they start with them."

"Do not talk about what's in my room, ever again." I rose and picked up my bookbag.

"Sorry, Dear." Yuki hopped out of her chair. There was something frog-like in the motion.

"What?" Haruhi looked at us. "Where are you going?"

"Home." I opened the door and waited for Yuki.

"But I haven't dismissed you, and Yuki hasn't finished her little story."

"Here." I grabbed Yuki by the upper arm and turned her around. "You take her home with you, and then she can tell you stories all night long."

"And how would I explain keeping a stinking fish monster in my house?" Haruhi folded her fingers under her chin. "Do be sensible, Kyon."

"I'll see you in class tomorrow." I pushed Yuki towards her. "And Yuki can tell you whatever you like as she's changing back to her schooldress."

"As you wish, Dear."

There was something about the way Haruhi said that last word that drew my attention back to her. My heart filled with a dread I could find no rational basis for. As I looked at Haruhi, I saw that Mikuru and Itsuki had thrown inquiring gazes not at her, but at me. I hurried out and closed the door behind me.

Yuki walked and rode after me in silence until I stopped in front of the convenience store near our home.

I held my bicycle with one hand and gave her some money with the other hand.

She looked up at me quizzically.

"Go get the things that Mikuru says you need. I'll wait here."

Yuki nodded and walked into the store.

That night I half expected her to demonstrate the application of whatever she bought, but she respected my privacy. My mom had caught wind of my date the next night with Yuki and provided me with some extra spending cash.

On the Friday morning trip to school I found Yuki had a more pleasant scent to her, but didn't comment on it. I'm not that shallow a guy.

Yuki brought her lunch to our classroom and ate at Haruhi's desk with us.

Haruhi named the outfit that Yuki should wear that evening and Yuki agreed to her selection. I found it curious that Haruhi would know what Mikuru had bought for my fish-monster fiancee, but did not comment on it.

After classes, Itsuki waited outside the clubroom with me while the girls changed, then held the door open for me.

I took one step inside the clubroom and stopped. Yuki was dressed as the cat maid and was preparing tea. Mikuru was seated at the table in her miko outfit. And Haruhi ...

"Don't you like it, Dear?" Haruhi arched her back with her hand on her hip. She was dressed up as a playboy bunny. "I wanted you to see me in this, to get your mind racing. Pity I can't wear it on our date tonight, not to anyplace that lets high school students in."

"What is the meaning of this?"

"According to sweet little Yuki here." Haruhi reached out and held Yuki against herself as she sniffed behind the shorter girl's ear. "And that is a very nice scent by the way. You'll have to tell me the brand sometime." Haruhi released Yuki, turned to me and bent forwards with her hands on her knees and her head thrown back. "You do like to see women objectified. You asked to see my club outfit and so here it is. Don't you like it, Dear?"

I turned away from her cleavage, before she could spill out of her top, and took my seat.

"You look enchanting, Haruhi." Itsuki nodded to her then sat across from me. "But all this talk of romance has me thinking of some unfinished brigade business."

Haruhi walked behind me and started running her fingers along my shoulders. "Oh, what is that?"

Itsuki waited for Yuki to put a cup of tea in front of him before continuing. "Perhaps we should visit Kyon's old girlfriend. I think she may have a few things to say about his current relationships."

"You bastard!" I tried to rise to punch him.

Haruhi pushed me back down into the chair by my shoulders then bent down to nuzzle her head against mine. "An excellent idea. I'm afraid that we may make a long night of it, so let's meet at the station at noon on Saturday. To give poor Kyon here a chance to recover. Then we can go see how Miss Sasaki is doing. You've made the appointment already?"

"Of course." Itsuki took a sip of the tea.

"Well, enough with show and tell." Haruhi released me. "We three do need to go get changed for our date tonight. Brigade dismissed."

I turned to her and saw that she smiled as she reached for the zipper behind her back.

I ran for the door.

Itsuki walked out at a more leisurely pace.

I waited for him to close the door behind him, then tried to punch him as he turned towards me.

He grabbed my arm and with no apparent effort twisted this behind my back and forced me against the wall. He leaned against me and asked in a whisper, "How did Haruhi know about Miss Sasaki?"

"Huh?" I relaxed and he dumped me to the floor. I turned back towards him. "Why do all of you know everything about me? What makes me so important?"

"You do have a brain?" He smiled at me. "Then use it." He turned and walked away.

I stood and exchanged greetings with Mikuru when she walked out in her schooldress.

Then I waited for Yuki, who emerged with Haruhi. Haruhi followed us down to the station then set out to her own house.

Back home I changed into causal clothes as my little sister "assisted" Yuki with her own change of clothes.

We walked out and Haruhi was waiting in front of my house with a matching outfit to Yuki's (in her own size of course), with one hand behind her back.

"What are you hiding?" I asked.

"Oh, you're no fun!" Haruhi grabbed Yuki with her free hand and pulled her to the other side and put matching hats on Yuki and herself.

As the girls turned back towards me I saw that they also now wore matching sunglasses as well.

"It's the correct prescription." Yuki looked at me and then into the distance as Haruhi slid her normal glasses into a case, put this into a purse and handed that to her.

"Look!" Haruhi held Yuki against herself as she put a matching purse over her own shoulder. "We're twins."

I supposed that the hats and the purses matched well with the outfits, but the sunglasses were a bit much for after sundown. "Can you see okay with those, Yuki?"

"Yes, Kyon. As you said, she adapted us for low light conditions." Yuki nodded towards Haruhi.

"Careful!" Haruhi wagged her finger at Yuki. Then moved over and put her arm through mine. "So, Dear. What fine dining establishment will you be treating us at tonight?"

"How about the one with the clown for a spokesman?"

"What? And after all the gifts I've provided for your fiancee? Night vision, immortality, protection from disease and such?"

"Who's being careful now?" Yuki grabbed my other arm.

"Oh, why did I make you girls so serious?" Haruhi made an exaggerated sigh.

"We presume that it was to increase the irony with respect to your own nature."

"But of course!" Haruhi tugged me forwards. "Let's hurry to dinner, Dear. I'm hungry enough to eat a sallaryman."

Whichever way she meant that, I hoped Haruhi was joking. 


	6. Chapter 6

The Shadow over Nishinomiya, chapter six By Henry J. Cobb

[My apologies to the obvious original authors, whose works should never be combined.]

"It's all so unsustainable," Haruhi Suzumiya swept her french fry like a pointer across the clown themed restaurant we were sitting in, dipped it in my paper ketchup cup, and tossed it into her mouth. She swallowed, then completed her sentence. "This modern human civilization."

"Why not let it collapse on it's own then?" Yuki Nagato folded up the wrapper for her second fish sandwich and picked up her third and final one. Unlike Haruhi, she had kept her hat and dark sunglasses on. Other than that, the two wore matching casual outfits, down to their purses and shoes.

It was a Friday evening, well after classes and so there was no need for them to dress in the same style as each other. It was just Haruhi being Haruhi. I took a bite of my hamburger and turned my attention back to Haruhi as she responded.

"Well, I could of course. But what's the fun in that?" Haruhi noticed that her fries container was empty and so took one of mine. "Kyon," She pointed the french fry at me. "What do you think? Would a mega-volcano under Antarctica be too obvious? We could come back and visit here, once all of this had been washed clean by the ocean."

"Yuki," I turned to the shorter girl, my fish-monster sea-hag fiancee. "Haruhi is just having fun at my expense. What is your excuse for clinging to me? Surely I'm not that interesting?"

Yuki put down her sandwich and turned to me. "Kyon, even if I didn't care for you, and I admit that my judgment on the issue may be clouded by what I know about you. Assume for just one minute that I am telling the truth about my effective immortality. Given what you know about me, what would you say would be my worst possible fate?"

I thought for a moment and came up with a joke. "To live forever without anything to read?"

"Exactly." Yuki nodded to me and then to Haruhi. "Even if she would maintain a breeding stock of humanity to please my sisters, I require more than that. I need at least a rump of human civilization to maintain a pool of writers sufficient to provide me with new books on a regular basis. Therefore I will use my influence with you, my Lord, to acquire the post of administration over humanity. As the arts give the first voice to rebellion, I should be able to maintain stability indefinitely. Humanity will come to see me as their benefactor. If not in the first few generations after the fall, then surely by the tenth or the twentieth. If I must act the part of her toy to maintain my position then so be it." Yuki picked up her sandwich and continued to casually consume it, as if she had spoken about something of no greater importance than the weekend weather forecast.

"Big talk for a little fish monster." Haruhi paused briefly in her plundering of my fries, to look at Yuki. "What makes you think that I won't cut you down, and serve you up as sashimi?"

Yuki looked up from her half-eaten sandwich. "Oh, you surely will at some point. Either out of jealously or in a childish tantrum at having your petty whims overruled in the interests of preserving the island of stability I will have established. But the opposite of love isn't hate, it's disinterest. As long as you hate me, and yet I bow to your whims, you will be loath to give up your toy. Also what I offer your ladyship is a limitless supply of educated sacrifices. The first few primitive brutes might prove interesting, but after a while those will all be the same. It will take you quite a while to find another of my sisters who will maintain an interesting human population out of self-interest, rather than mere ambition." Yuki went back to eating, while Haruhi glared at her.

I looked over at Yuki, then grabbed the last of my fries before Haruhi could snatch them away. "Yuki, I'm willing to grant that either you are not human or you have access to an immense special effects budget at a level that the Japanese government would have to stretch to accomplish. But, what does this have to do with me? I'm just an ordinary high school student. What part do I play in your grand schemes?"

"My Lord," Yuki folded up the last of her sandwich wrappers. "I could argue that all three of us seated at this table were human. But it would require much less of a stretch of the definition of humanity for myself, than it would for yourself and your eternal wife."

"So, little fish monster." Haruhi crossed her arms and smiled smugly. "You do admit to your bigamy."

Yuki gave Haruhi what I assumed was her usual fish-eyed stare from behind her dark sunglasses as she placed her hand on mine, lifting her finger that wore the engagement ring just slightly. "It is strange indeed to hear our queen preach the virtues of monogamy. Did the ritual damage your soul in some way, your Majesty?"

Haruhi's smile was replaced with a scowl.

Yuki grasped my hand and turned to me. "My Lord, any of my sisters would consider it a great honor to lay with you, in whatever form. I admit that discovering your true identity was the deciding factor in changing my calculations. But now that I truly know you, you are so much more to me. If you will stand beside me, then I will gladly put up with my sisters and her as well." Yuki nodded towards Haruhi. "Until her Majesty tires of me. And that will be on the day when I look her in the eyes and honestly swear my true love and devotion for her, of course. At some point I will tire of my life and grant her this victory, that only her own impatience can deny her."

Haruhi put her hands down on the edge of the table and was about to say something, when another voice shouted out.

"You!" It was Taniguchi. He was standing there in the doorway of the restaurant. His normally neatly combed hair was a mess. "Kyon, what are you doing sitting with those monsters? Do you want to wind up just like them?"

Two of the mall's security guards caught up to Taniguchi and grabbed his arms.

"Don't touch me!" He yanked out of their grasp. "Don't come near me! They're after me. They'll come after you also!" He looked around wildly, then ran off, with the guards in pursuit.

"Well, that's killed the mood." Haruhi stood, then turned back to us. "Kyon, take your fiancee home. I'm afraid it won't be safe out tonight. For man or beast."

On Saturday Itsuki had a van that that took all the members of the brigade to that institution. I was starting to think we all belonged there.

As we entered the room, I saw that Sasaki was seated in a chair. Two rather impressively large attendants flanked her and watched her nervously. She wore the same institution coveralls as she had during my last visit. Even her hair had been kept at the same length.

"Hello Kyon." Sasaki kept her eyes on the floor and her voice a flat monotone. "I see you have some new friends."

"Uh, Sasaki. How have you been?"

"Oh, it's okay. They don't let me out much. They've given me some stuff. It helps to calm my nerves. I get to read and watch television. Not the news of course. I don't need to be reminded of what's to come." Sasaki's gaze wandered around the floor until it settled on Yuki's legs. She followed these up to Yuki's face and studied that for a moment.

Yuki blinked slowly, as usual, but I think I detected the faintest hint of nervousness.

Sasaki turned to me. "So you've found the kappa now. That must mean..." She looked at Mikuru briefly, then her gaze settled on Haruhi. "Yes, the girl with the same eyes as yours. Other than the eyes, there's something familiar about her. Sorry that I can't quite place the face. My memory's a little fuzzy from the stuff they give me here. I wonder what she was called. You know, before."

"I'm Haruhi Suzumiya." Haruhi smiled, in her oh so not nice at all way.

"Haruhi Suzumiya? I knew a girl with that name once, before you killed her!" Sasaki shouted the last of that as she sprang from her chair. The guards reached for her, but she was too fast for them. She leapt forwards with her thumbs pointed at Haruhi's eyes.

Thwack!

Haruhi's slap threw Sasaki back into the arms of her guards. The imprint of Haruhi's fingers had cut into Sasaki's cheek and little drops of blood oozed slowly from the wounds.

"Killed her?" Haruhi leaned forwards. "Miss Suzumiya would have bled to death that night if I hadn't shown her how to draw the final runes. And guess what?" Haruhi tapped her own forehead. "She's still in here. She's loving every moment of this. She would have died rather than continuing on in her miserable little existence. Never have I known a human being so eager and willing to throw away the lies of mankind and embrace the truth. I like this girl. I want to keep her. Perhaps by transferring her into an immortal body?" Haruhi looked over at Yuki and smiled for a moment, then shook her head. "Well, not an ugly one. I'll figure something out." She turned back to Sasaki. "Do you have any other pearls of wisdom for us today?"

Sasaki slumped in the arms of the guards, but they kept careful grips on her arms. "Can I be excused now? I need to wash that thing's stink off of me." She looked down and watched her blood drip slowly to the floor. "And tell the doctor I'll need a pill to settle my nerves so I can sleep tonight. The good stuff. I don't need those dreams."

"Sorry about this." One of the guards turned to Itsuki. "Will there be anything else, Sir?"

"No, that's all for now." He replied. "Please keep good care of her."

"We will, Sir."

Haruhi grabbed my arm and turned me away from Sasaki. "Kyon, you have such rotten taste in girlfriends. But don't worry, Dear. I'll soon save you from all of this."

That evening I didn't pay much attention to what was served for dinner or what was said.

When Yuki followed me naked into the bathroom something inside me snapped. I grabbed her and kissed her roughly. Then I bent her against the wall and took her virginity. Later I washed her from head to toes, while avoiding looking her in the eyes.

Only later as we soaked in the tub with her body leaning back on my chest did my mistake occur to me. "Damn it."

She turned her head towards me. "It was the first time for both of us. I'm sure we will improve with practice. And as I said, this is a great honor for me."

"Not that. What will we call her?"

"Her?"

"Our daughter."

"Oh." Yuki shook her head. "Do not worry about that for the moment. My fertile cycle has passed. It does not happen as often for me as it would for a human woman, especially given my young age. You do not wish to have a child at this time?"

"Of course not." I lazily ran my hands along her body.

"Then I shall sleep in the tub during those times. And I shall remind you when there is a danger."

"Where will you sleep the rest of the time?"

"Our bed."

"Fair enough."

We got out of the tub and dried each other off. That night she slept with me in my bed.

On Sunday morning I awoke to the sound of a page turning. I opened my eyes and saw that Yuki was reading a book. I still had my arms wrapped around her and she took advantage of my shoulder to lift her head up to a comfortable reading position. I wondered briefly how she had managed that without disturbing me. The light was far too dim for me to make out what was written in the book, but her non-human eyes had no problems. I wondered if her huge glasses somehow helped them collect more light.

I leaned over to sniff at her neck. Her fishy odor didn't bother me as much as it had before. Perhaps I was just getting used to it.

"Are you ready for more?" She kept reading.

"Yeah." I started to unbutton her pajamas.

She put her book and glasses aside then rolled over towards me.

Later we washed up, got dressed and moved her few things into my room. My family didn't comment, but my little sister looked a little disappointed. That afternoon we made two interruptions for "more", but I still finished my homework in much less than time than usual, thanks to Yuki's tutelage. She also took a more active role and coached me during the non-schoolwork activities. Apparently she had read quite a bit in that area, but I was her first partner to practice with.

I wasn't surprised to see that the Monday newspaper carried the story of Taniguchi's mysterious disappearance. And I hardly paid any attention when my little sister begged me again at breakfast to protect "Big sister Yuki", but as I waited outside the clubroom that afternoon for the girls to change into their "club uniforms" the horror my life had become suddenly hit me.

I slumped down to the floor of the corridor outside our clubroom, and buried my face in my hands.

I heard Itsuki sit down next to me, so I turned to him and asked, "Why don't you stop her?"

"Me?" His surprise almost looked genuine.

"Do I have to spell it out for you? Get one of your troopers to blow her head off with a sniper rifle."

"Weren't you listening on Saturday?" He examined my face. "Haruhi is constraining Her. Even threatening to take Her new toy away might cause Her to discard it out of pique. And then where would we be? The real problem remains her partner."

"And what do you want me to do about that? I'm just an ordinary high school student."

"Well, that's for you to decide. To be Kyon, or not to be Kyon." He stood. "The girls have finished changing. It's best not to keep them waiting."

-HJC 


	7. Chapter 7

Monday night I finally achieved a level of affection and intimacy with Yuki Nagato that I think could genuinely be considered 'making love' instead of just the base animal action she had willingly allowed me to inflict on her the previous weekend.

Afterwards I held her in my arms and whispered in her ears. "Well?"

"Yes? Have you recovered for more?" Without her glasses she was nearly blind (on land at least) and so had to reach down to find the negative response to her question.

"Not that." I grabbed her hand in mine. "You said if we did this, then you would tell me everything. So start talking."

"Not here."

"Why not?" I looked around my darkened room. It wasn't that I was ashamed of what we had done. I just wanted to level the visual playing field between us. Her superior night vision against my land adjusted visual focus.

"The humans have listening devices here."

"So remove those."

"They would keep replacing them until they settled on something I didn't find. Let's go down to the beach on Sunday. It's still a bit cool so not many humans will be out swimming."

"I thought you said you had to avoid the ocean?"

"As a mistress of The Dragon I have the equivalent legal protection of diplomatic immunity. Should I start carrying your daughter then I would advance to the rank of a concubine of The Dragon and I would have actual social rank."

"The Dragon?"

"Humans have had many names for the lord of fire. I will explain more this weekend."

"Any chance of your rank advancement now?"

"Not for several months, my Lord. My fertility differs from that of a pure human woman. But unlike a human woman of six decades, mine is just beginning rather than at an end."

"So, are you ready for more?"

"My Lord, I can neither ask nor refuse. But personally it means a great deal to me that you do ask. And my answer at this moment is a most enthusiastic yes."

"Good to hear it." I rolled her slim frame over on top of myself.

Yuki kept showing up for lunch at Haruhi's table, and made up for the reading time she lost to our lovemaking at home by returning to her big chair to read in the clubroom, whenever she wasn't needed for maid service.

I could feel Haruhi's eyes on us whenever Yuki was near me in the clubroom, but the rest of the week passed without further incident, or mysterious disappearances. But finally on Friday Haruhi spoke out. "Yuki."

"Yes, Ma'am?"

"You can take the costume home with you."

"We don't wear costumes at home, Ma'am."

Haruhi narrowed her eyes, as if she had caught a subtext of 'or anything else' in Yuki's words. "No, to wash it. It's starting to get too much of your fishy stench on it."

"My apologies, Ma'am. I will see to it this weekend."

"Not on Saturday morning of course. We'll have our regular hunt then."

"As you wish, Ma'am."

After we returned home from the victim hunt on Saturday we started on our homework. My little sister asked what the hurry was with that and Yuki explained that we were going down to the beach the next day. Little sister didn't believe this at first, but Yuki assured her that my protection was all that she needed. At this point little sister begged to come along and Yuki agreed.

My mother raised an eyebrow at the catgirl maid outfit in the laundry, but didn't speak out about it. My latest report card had been a golden ticket for Yuki to get away with anything, even sleeping with me.

Even behind her dark sunglasses I could see the tiny hints of Yuki's amusement as my sister put one foot in the cold water of the late springtime ocean and then retreated to just building sandcastles.

Yuki took off her blouse and skirt, then put her sunglasses to the side and stood there with eyes closed in just her school swimming suit. I stripped down to my swimming trunks and led her by the hand to the ocean.

In the water Yuki led me out a bit and then lay me on my back, floating underneath me with her hands on my shoulders. Then she blew some bubbles around my neck.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

She ran her fingers through my ears to force out the remaining air there then whispered from under me. "Switching to my gills and finding neutral buoyancy. Am I dragging you down?"

"No. This seems comfortable, except for the chill of the water."

"Please, my Lord. Keep your voice down. And warn me if it gets too much for you and I shall take you to shore."

"So we're safe from eavesdropping by the humans?"

"They can lip read you at least."

"And they won't use some sort of underwater listening device to track what you are saying?"

"I have been greeted by three of my sisters in the water, by my new title."

"Oh. What about Haruhi then?"

"She must be a truly incredible soul, in ways that we other mere mortals can only guess at. Never in the history of my kind, several times longer than human history, has our queen been so focused on a single person. If your suggestion of taking out Haruhi were to be implemented then our queen might be very upset."

"And what is she?"

"The Greeks called Her Hydra and the Christians called Her Legion. As She said, She created my race a hundred thousand years ago. She may have had a hand in the evolution of mankind, millions of years before that. There are rumors that she started life on Earth twice. Both before you arranged the collision that raised the moon and afterwards. But perhaps she is lying about that."

"Me?"

"My Lord, vast may be Her power and infinite Her existence, but She, as do we, truly fears you. Her wrath is a great storm that scours the land and causes great damage then passes. Your wrath is the volcano, that blows apart mountains, raises and shatters continents. It is whispered that what She truly fears is that You may refuse to see Her anymore and She would be left alone for all time, once we, Her playthings, have passed away."

"I'm starting to feel the chill."

"Okay, heading back to shore."

We spent another hour out on the beach. Yuki read a book while I helped little sister build her sand castles. Then the tide came in and washed these away.

Haruhi kept her distance for the rest of the school semester, leaving me to Yuki while she pursued her own mysterious agenda, but we did meet regularly as the SOS brigade.

For example she registered us in a baseball tournament as the 'North High Kappas'. We filled out our numbers with Haruhi bringing Emiri Kimidori, Mikuru bringing her childhood friend and scion of the wealthy patrons of her shrine, Miss Tsuruya, and I brought my little sister.

Miss Tsuruya's hair was a darker green than Miss Kimidori's and she had her hands all over Mikuru's body whenever she had an excuse, especially while showing her how to swing the bat. Mikuru didn't seem to notice this, nor how the two green haired girls seemed to slightly bow to Haruhi, but I think Itsuki caught it. Yuki may have noticed, but didn't comment on it.

The semi-professional baseball team we were up against was very good and were three runs ahead by the bottom of the last inning.

As we were waiting for our turns at bat I asked Miss Kimidori if they had ever found her missing boyfriend. She replied of course not, but that he had excellent taste. At this I glanced down at her body.

"Oh, I'm not showing yet." Miss Kimidori followed my gaze down to her belly, then looked me in the eyes. "But I will be taking the next two semesters off."

I stared into her large fishy eyes and saw that she wore contact lenses of a design I hadn't seen before. I pondered demanding a pair of those for Yuki, but I liked my glasses girl.

Haruhi called me to bat, and I struck out. My sister yelled at me for leaving her there on first base. (A position she had achieved only because her own strike zone was so small.)

Miss Kimidori bunted and advanced to first, then Yuki struck out.

As Mikuru stood at bat the pitcher leered at her lush body in the tight outfit that Haruhi had picked for her. Haruhi waited until he was throwing the ball before shouting out, "She's a shrine maiden!"

The pitch went wild and Mikuru cried out pitifully as the ball struck her side. The umpire asked if she was okay, then when she nodded with tears in her eyes, told her to take her base.

With the bases loaded the pitcher threw his best fast ball at Haruhi. She hit it out of the park. After soaking in the other team's lamentations, she conceded to them, because she found baseball boring.

At our last brigade meeting before the end of the semester, Haruhi announced as a special treat that we would all be heading out to an island resort owned by a friend of hers, to thank us all for our hard work all semester.

That Sunday afternoon I met with Mikuru at Itsuki's chruch. The priest escorted us to his room and he welcomed us in.

I saw that an additional chair had been provided. I waited until we all were seated and then turned to Itsuki. "This is a trap, isn't it?"

"What? No, you're free to go if you like."

"I mean Haruhi's trip. This is her big move, isn't it?"

"Yes. Our astrological calculations put the stars in the correct alignment right in the middle of the trip." He turned to Mikuru. "And yours?"

"Yes, the omens are aligned. And my dreams have been especially troubled as of late."

I couldn't remember the last time I had dreamed. It had been something about a great flood, washing away the buildings of Nishinomiya. I shook my head. "Why wait then? Jump Haruhi's schedule and arrest her now."

"She will have a gathering at her island. The self defense forces will come in with backing by the United States Marines to round up Haruhi's entire support structure. The cover story will be about a mix-up with a military exercise going to the wrong island by mistake."

"What about Haruhi, are you going to kill her?"

"No." Itsuki looked me in the eyes. "As I said that wouldn't be helpful. But I think we can convince her to go into captivity, if we have her friends, and you order her to surrender herself."

"Me? Okay, everybody thinks I'm so crucial to all of this. Well fine, here's my price. I keep Yuki and we get to live in peace."

"Not ideal, but acceptable." Itsuki turned to Mikuru. "And your side?"

"We also agree to Kyon's terms."

My little sister wanted to go on the trip, but Yuki talked her out of it.

The trip there was uneventful and we were greeted by four suspicious looking characters, two brothers, a maid and a butler.

We spent the first day on the beach. Yuki stayed on the beach and read, while Haruhi played with us in the surf for a bit before swimming out a bit and seemingly talked to herself.

As we gathered for dinner that night the stormclouds gathered and the rain was coming down heavily as we ate. There seemed to be a slight aftertaste to the meal.

I slumped into darkness at my seat and awoke outside to the sound of thunder. I felt cold and tried to rise. I couldn't. I looked down and saw that I was bound by several heavy chains to a throne that had been roughly carved into a solid block of rock and by the looks of it a very very long time ago.

Alerted to the rattling of my chains, Haruhi turned from the storm to look at me. She was nude, not naked. She wasn't the one who was completely vulnerable.

I forced my gaze up to her wilder than usual eyes. "Either you have greatly overestimated my strength or I have greatly underestimated it."

"The later, my love. Give up your delusions of normalcy and walk free, or watch as I sacrifice these two virgins to celebrate our new world order." She pointed to Itsuki and Mikuru, who were tied to crude stone altars beside my throne, but not to Yuki who was tied up at a slight distance, or our hosts who now wore black robes as they chanted in a language that I suspected was far older than Japanese.

"I'm not a virgin!"

"What?" All the other members of the SOS Brigade asked as we turned towards Itsuki, our current situation momentarily overshadowed.

"I was raised by a secretive order of lonely old Catholic priests." He continued. "My backside's seen more assaults than the slopes of Mount Suribachi."

Even our horrible inhuman leader seemed taken aback for a moment, then she swallowed to clear her throat. "That doesn't count."

"What?" Itsuki seemed stunned at this.

"It doesn't matter." Haruhi waved it off. "It's the thought that counts. It's not like you're even needed for all of this. I just liked the symmetry. Even if Mikuru tells us she's been whoring herself out to support the family shrine, it doesn't matter to me."

"I would never!" Mikuru wailed piteously. Apparently having doubt cast on her chastity was a worse fate than being offered up as a sacrifice to mark the end of the world.

Was the world going to end? Did I want it to end? Even with all of this, with the fate of the world being at stake, I couldn't shake what fun I was having. The sense of adventure with everything poised at the brink. Did I want to seize this power everybody thought I had and use it to crush Haruhi? Hell no. I wanted to continue the game and stay a member of the brigade. Why couldn't she see this? I stared at her intently.

Haruhi stopped and turned to me. "Yes, what is it, Dear?"

"Why did you come to Earth?" I asked her.

"Me? I only followed you, Dear. You are the one who picked this planet."

"Why did I say I wanted to come to Earth?"

"You said it was interesting." Haruhi walked over to stand in front of me. "But all you've done is lurk around the same boring spot on this miserable globe for the last hundred thousand years. I'm just too bored to take it anymore."

"Fine, that's my fault. Let's go see the rest of it."

"At last you're seeing things my way, Dear." She reached down to raise my chin to face her. "Let's discard these flimsy human shells, take our true forms, and wash the cities of Man from this pathetic sphere."

"No."

"No?"

"Don't settle for wandering through the soggy ashes of a destroyed civilization. Let's go see what all of the Earth is like. Let's see it active and alive, as human beings."

"Oh, Dear." She shook her head sadly. "Yet more delay?"

"Let's live these lives fully, without regret. After these bodies die, we can do it your way."

She lightly bit her lip. "Do you promise?"

"I do."

"Very well then." Haruhi waved her hand at the sky. The storm clouds did not instantly part, but the force of the storm, the wind and the rain, began to abate. She turned to the cultists. "Leave us now, before the human authorities arrive."

They bowed and left. I never found out what happened to them, but at least the strange disappearances and other bizarre occurrences in Nishinomiya came to a halt.

Epilogue:

The last few decades of the age of man passed rather peacefully, for myself at least. Japan managed to stay out of the 21st Century wars after all. I married Yuki (as if we were a human couple). And while Haruhi seemed happy to help raise our three daughters, she said she had no use for any children from her own borrowed body, as these would be merely human. The girls did also seem to appreciate "Auntie Haruhi", especially once they were informed about their own natures and hers.

Kyon's little sister tried, but she just couldn't wrap her head around the true nature of the Universe. It was at her funeral that I decided to pull the plug.

It's been a few centuries since the fall of man, and I can feel the last bits of Kyon slipping away from me. So I've decided to write up Yuki's story now, while I still have a trace of that writer's soul. She's still with us of course, along with the daughters, granddaughters and now even a great-granddaughter on the way. The entire family of "little fish monsters" takes after Yuki more than they do Kyon or myself. I love them all, but I've made it clear that alone won't buy them any special breaks.

As I'm writing this I can see that the latest maiden of the Asahina shrine is starting her nightly naked dance of worship of me. Though she remains as equally beautiful as her distant ancestress (through a careful breeding selection of her pure human line), I'm no longer human enough to find this arousing. It's just one of the honors and humiliations my queen imposes on the Asahina shrine maidens for being descendants of Kyon.

The dancer had a younger brother, who was the father of Yuki's forthcoming great-granddaughter (poor boy). The dancer's young daughter is now sitting in the corner of the throne room and memorizing every step and sound of the chant, to be ready to take her mother's place when her time comes. And if my queen finds some blemish in the girl's performance... Well at least from the looks of things, the young girl will have a sibling in a few months, to either act as an understudy, or be bred then fed to monsters. You know, depending on gender.

My queen insisted on moving to the Asahina shrine after the fall and I found no reason to object. Its position in the hills above Nishinomiya places it just above the new shoreline. Mikuru Asahina lost her mind on the night of the fall when Haruhi gleefully stripped away the plaster from the walls of the shrine to show the glyphs of the Deep Ones carved into the rock. Mikuru just couldn't handle the fact that her entire life had been in service to our cause.

Mikuru withdrew from the world and would just barely respond to the point of eating food that was placed in front of her and being led around by the hand to take care of her base biological needs. Haruhi keep urging me to do it, and finally I gave it and lay with Mikuru. Her mind was absent even during the act, but her body responded enthusiastically.

Nine months later the first cry of her daughter woke Mikuru up. Mikuru seemed so lively those last three years, if a little disengaged. She would remark on the changes in the world around her and respond when addressed, while at the same time walking around obliviously topless to nurse our child. Then one day Mikuru snapped and tried to take a knife to her own three year old daughter. It was at that point that Haruhi cut her down. The Asahinas since then have been much better behaved. It's amazing what environments these humans can adapt to, if they are born into them.

Miss Tsuruya also managed to score a daughter off of Kyon. (What can I say? I know it's no excuse, but I went on quite a bender after the end of the world as Mankind had known it. I was still human enough to be haunted by the screams, and to be tempted.) Tsuruya has returned to the sea now, but she keeps a descendant at my court to relay the concerns of the council of the Deepest Ones. It was purely a political move on Tsuruya's part, as she returned to her skirt chasing ways (or whatever they call it under the sea) afterwards. But I seem to have had a revenge of sorts on her. Yuki said that Tsuruya once confided to her that after one night of pleasure with The Dragon, everything else above or below the waves has been but a poor shadow. I've adapted my form to travel freely to the bottom of the ocean and the council's messages do seem to be faithfully transmitted to me. Tsuruya avoids me on brief trips down there, and that's fine with me. Let her beg. Well anyway I don't dare leave Haruhi unsupervised on the surface for long. (Haruhi is giving me such a look as I write this.)

Yes, Haruhi. Well she's still with us, and doesn't look a day over twenty five. My queen claims that a mere tiny fraction of her power is required, but only Haruhi's boundless ego could hope to maintain the same form after centuries of regeneration. She's been lying on my coils and reading as I've been writing along. How she manages to do that and not be scratched by my scales in her outfit that covers precious little is a mystery to me.

I extend two tentacles to massage Haruhi's shoulders and she turns over to lie back against my coils. I take this as an invitation to extend more of these to touch her all over. She doesn't resist as I unfasten, gently remove, and place to the side, her scanty garments. Even the boots have to go. I'll need full access to every part of her body, even the bottoms of her feet and between her toes for my fiendish assault. Both the extraordinary woman and the unique goddess inside her claim that I provide them with a level of stimulation that even a group of women and men working together could not hope to match. It's a boast that I try to live up to.

It's those two who are the real power couple. I'm just a hanger on. Many nights I'll be working on my own projects while queen and concubine talk for hours, taking turns with the same pair of lips. It's only when there's a sudden silence that I know to look up and be prompted for the correct response by one of Yuki's daughters or now granddaughters.

That used to be Yuki's most important job at court, but her visits to the surface have gotten rarer as of late. In a few more centuries Yuki will be unable to visit the surface at all, and my queen will have to choose between tormenting Yuki or maintaining Haruhi's life. But that's a problem for another time. For now my queen demands my undivided attention and She will get it.

-HJC


End file.
